tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-46110736705398833042024-02-19T06:00:51.206+00:00Older Single MumChallenging Our Perceptions of Single Mums.
'Always gripping.' 'Glamorous.' 'Inspiring.' 'Heartwarming.' 'Hilarious.'Older Single Mumhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16752771952921898184noreply@blogger.comBlogger307125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4611073670539883304.post-29804894665967943412016-07-25T08:43:00.000+01:002016-09-06T23:27:08.083+01:00The (Free) Word Game.<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue light" , , "helvetica" , "arial" , sans-serif;"><br /></span>
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<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Playing The Word Game any time, anywhere!</td></tr>
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We were recently introduced to a brilliant and truly simple game that's perfect for car journeys, long waits in restaurants, bedtime, bath time or any point during the day just for fun!<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue light" , , "helvetica" , "arial" , sans-serif;"></span><br />
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And it's free, requires no equipment, plus is perfect from quite a young age. </div>
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What is this Holy Grail for the holidays I hear you ask?</div>
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It's called The Word Game. </div>
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Any number of players can work, from two to twenty. </div>
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In fact, my youngest son starts a game every morning when he comes in for a cuddle at stupid o'clock, just us, quietly and he really impresses me with his understanding, ideas and vocabulary. The oldest adds his own twist when he ventures in and manages to do the same. </div>
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Isn't it great how our children are always amazing us? </div>
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With any luck, depending on your playmates, if they're anything like mine, it can be really funny. I've found it best to ban the poo / fart/ bum words because they tend to be hysterically overused but it's good to hear so many giggles if you don't mind them. </div>
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One person starts with any word they choose, one that can have another added to it and it make sense. </div>
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You're not supposed to use colours or ones that have already been said during that particular game, but we're not very strict. The next person adds a word to it and the following turn taken picks up the last word only and adds a new one. And so on. </div>
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But beware, all your secrets will come out. </div>
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Here's how one of ours roughly went recently. </div>
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7yo: Christmas </div>
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11yo: (Christmas) Cake</div>
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Me: Cup (Cake)</div>
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7yo: Plastic (cup)</div>
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11yo: (Plastic) spoon</div>
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Me: (Spoon) feed</div>
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7yo: Bird (Feed) </div>
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11yo: Flying (Bird)</div>
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Me: (Flying) Aeroplane</div>
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7yo: Massive (Aeroplane)</div>
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11yo: (Massive) tree</div>
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Me: (Tree) root</div>
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7yo: Re-calculating Route!</div>
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And on it goes for as long as you let it.</div>
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We love it. And it's good just for adults too.</div>
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What games do you play that are easy and while away the hours with a laugh? </div>
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Anya xx</div>
Older Single Mumhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16752771952921898184noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4611073670539883304.post-35762227876774556032016-07-14T08:00:00.000+01:002016-07-14T08:00:06.339+01:00Exclusive Offer for Stays at Middle Piccadilly, Rural Retreat, Dorset. <div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Peaceful Lane where Middle Piccadilly can be found. Honest!</td></tr>
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If you've taken an interest in my last few posts about Middle Piccadilly, the lovely little Healing Retreat in the heart of the Dorset countryside, you may be pleased to see that, exclusively for my readers, they are happy to offer a 10% discount on all stays AND therapies booked before the end of July and taken before the end of this year.**<br />
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Seeing as the rooms and full board are only £120 or £135 per person per night anyhow and also seeing as their sole aim is to provide the opportunity to help you re-connect with yourself away from the stresses and strains of every day life and we wouldn't bat an eyelid about spending it to keep our cars going, it must be worth giving some serious thought to?<br />
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I really felt quite invigorated on my return and am definitely going to visit again. It's gladdening they have stayed true to their roots, that their ethics remain pure and that their treatments are still top notch. There's nothing like investing in yourself - some time, energy and attention - for real rewards and most of us mums and dads just don't do enough of it!<br />
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Much is made of the food there and it's fundamental to a stay. Dominic Harvey, son of the founders and resident chef as well as all round Manager, has maintained their tradition of serving vegetarian cuisine. The reasoning behind this is it puts far less strain on the digestive system and body in general and, therefore, much more can be gained from the holistic treatments undergone.<br />
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Over the years, he has experimented and explored and created a unique and adventurous repertoire, driven mainly by demand and a passion for puddings and all things healthy, without being boring. He has amassed a wealth of knowledge - like how most cashew nuts aren't really raw, so genuine ones have to be specially sourced - and recipes galore - juices, salads and full on Cordon Vert cuisine - which he's finally put into a book, to launch soon.<br />
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It's called Feed Green and the best way to find out about it is to <a href="http://middlepiccadilly.us2.list-manage.com/subscribe?u=0909054a574ca88d953b8a491&id=d6919bb5fb" target="_blank">sign up to Middle Piccadilly's Newsletter - </a> and / or follow his brand new blog - <a href="http://www.dominicharvey.co.uk/" target="_blank">The Lifestyle Chef</a> and<a href="https://www.instagram.com/the_lifestylechef/" target="_blank"> / or Instagram account</a>. He showed me some of the pictures and they're fab.<br />
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One thing is for sure, you never go hungry or without home comforts here!<br />
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<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Food is fundamental to a stay at Middle Piccadilly. </td></tr>
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You can also follow Middle Piccadilly too on <a href="https://www.facebook.com/middlepicadillyruralretreat" target="_blank">Facebook </a>and / or Twitter (@midpiccadilly) / Instagram (@middle_piccadilly). They're a bit new to Social Media and most information is available on <a href="http://www.middlepiccadilly.com/" target="_blank">their website</a>, but I urge you to think of yourself - perhaps for a change - and consider re-connecting with who you used to be or who you really are, not only in the way that they provide opportunity for, but in general.<br />
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I spoke about my rage and about how hard things can be for many mums (and dads). Sometimes, just taking a short spell away from everything can be an amazing tonic and help us seize the moment more as our childrens' milestones speed swiftly past. <br />
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Here's what some of the other guests wrote and there were copious pages and cards in a similar vein -<br />
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<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEglNAhSRS9YGf9mo0l57nTwrGKY8QvW76P1YXIu_V88FYfGx4MwW9Xle0zlfppz8njrs5HnD7vy5v2OjQT8BvXcf86HZbrYmGukyWhBI6v7L4aTLSk7t2jAzyDGrs08VzQZkziUlF8VKmlN/s1600/guest+book+3.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img alt=" middle piccadilly, guest book," border="0" height="200" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEglNAhSRS9YGf9mo0l57nTwrGKY8QvW76P1YXIu_V88FYfGx4MwW9Xle0zlfppz8njrs5HnD7vy5v2OjQT8BvXcf86HZbrYmGukyWhBI6v7L4aTLSk7t2jAzyDGrs08VzQZkziUlF8VKmlN/s400/guest+book+3.jpg" title="middle piccadilly, guest book," width="400" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Taken from the guest book at Middle Piccadilly. </td></tr>
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It seems there's a great deal to be said, therefore, for just being still and this rather rustic place in the middle of nowhere gives you you through that or a great kick-start and I thank them from the bottom of my heart for it all.<br />
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Disclosure - I was a guest of Middle Piccadilly and provided with two treatments for the purposes of this review. The requirement was only for one honest post, but considering my history with them, my passion for natural medicine and the real healing that occurred, I wanted to do more. All words and pics are my own.<br />
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**This very generous 10% discount cannot to be taken in conjunction with any other offer. <br />
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<a href="http://www.oldersinglemum.com/2016/07/turning-back-time-to-middle-piccadilly.html" target="_blank">Turning Back Time to Middle Piccadilly Healing Retreat in Dorset.</a><br />
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<a href="http://www.oldersinglemum.com/2016/07/middle-piccadilly-retreat-day-one-eat.html" target="_blank">Day One: Eat, Treatment, Sleep, Repeat.</a><br />
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<a href="http://www.oldersinglemum.com/2016/07/shamanic-healing-and-shamanka-school.html" target="_blank">Day Two: Shamanic Healing and Shamanka School.</a><br />
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Anya XXOlder Single Mumhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16752771952921898184noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4611073670539883304.post-12634639993608025552016-07-13T08:00:00.000+01:002016-07-15T08:32:11.619+01:00Shamanic Healing and Shamanka School, Middle Piccadilly, Day Two.<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">The Star Room at Middle Piccadilly. Image credit - theirs. </td></tr>
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Well it was weird, no doubt about it!<br />
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Shamanic Healers always seem the most 'out there' people I've ever met once in a treatment session, yet outside of it, the most grounded, pleasant, happy-in-themselves ones.<br />
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You may have heard of Shamans - Native American Healers. They are the most profound and wise teachers and Eliana Harvey, whose hands I was now in, has spent many years being guided by them and passing on what she has learned through her own school - <a href="http://www.shamanka.com/" target="_blank">Shamanka, Traditional School of Women's Shamanism.</a><br />
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It involves four modules per year for two years and is certainly worth exploring, if as she says, you feel that life has lost its magic. It takes place in Dorset at <a href="http://www.middlepiccadilly.com/" target="_blank">Middle Piccadilly</a>, focuses on finding your true feminine empowered self and the 'Path of the Heart.' It's not about being a Practitioner, it's about embracing unseen worlds, drawing on ancient woman's heritage and being the best intuitive you.<br />
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At 86 years old and having recently returned from working with Mayan and Inca Masters in Peru, she surprised me in many ways, initially by the lithe way she crouched down, lit a tea light candle positioned on the floor and got up without a groan or a grunt or a flicker of anything untoward of a woman less than half her age. This, in itself, was astounding and she put it down to a yoga rourtine she has devised when I commented upon her unquestionable suppleness.<br />
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Her sharp intellect and fairly cut glass accent kind of cut through any insecurity one might be feeling as she calls upon her Power Animals and our ancestors and instructs you to walk around the room and choose which direction feels right to lie in on the floor.<br />
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I was lucky to be in the Star Room and, as I paced about, was torn between two ways to position myself. These transpired to be the something or other parent, which I can't remember and, the one I (unwittingly) plumped for in the end bang opposite was, she told me matter of factly, 'The Wounded Child.'<br />
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It's traditional to use drumming and rattles to help to heal any trauma that might be creating a negative pattern with regard to our our emotional, physical or spiritual well-being, and although this can be alarming it's best not to knock it until you've tried it!<br />
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I was really quite reticent to deal with my rage still, but let myself be guided by expert Eliana as she told me to give other people back 'their shit!' It wasn't so difficult once I got going. In fact, it was actually quite cathartic.<br />
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We talked about me not knowing who my real father is and how hard it was growing up with different colour skin than almost everyone else around me. She felt that I had inherited some of my 'Second sight' from his side and there must be a purpose behind it and seeing as how healing is also on my mother's side (I own an old fashioned remedy book of my great-grandfather, with his hand-written notes in the margins), how I've been dealt a double dose of sensitivy which makes life hard.<br />
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Gosh, there was a lot there and it would take more than an hour to deal with a lifetime's worth. Once again, though, just because the treatment itself was over, it didn't mean the work stopped. I've found this quite a handy tool when I'm out walking, feeling what's going on in my body and giving it right back where it belongs, saying stuff I didn't even know I wanted to say. It's very empowering, interesting and really recommended!<br />
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Eliana advises us to call upon our own Power Animals - at any time - and I could see a huge eagle behind me, protecting me with its wings. I was worried my children were with their father and she told me to call upon theirs. Immediately, there came a deer for my oldest son, whom she said we could transform into a stag, which made sound sense because of his gentle nature and his strength and for my youngest son, a lion came instantly.<br />
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Anyone who knows him will know this suits him down to the ground. He has a lion heart and is enormously protective and loud!<br />
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There isn't time to think these things up. You just ask and they appear.<br />
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I felt I wanted to go on and on with what we were doing. It was like we had tapped into a source of real power and I was really loathe to let go.<br />
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But the great thing is, you don't have to. I still feel connected and these unseen worlds are there for us all.<br />
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Not all the treatments on offer are so off the wall, but rarely will you have the opportunity to undergo anything like this elsewhere. It's why all the other guests decided to try one out too and each of them (all with different Practitioners trained by Eliana) said they had been bowled over - the general consensus being 'weird but wonderful.'<br />
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<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">The rural setting is sublime. </td></tr>
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Middle Piccadilly is probably ahead of its time. Increasingly, scientists are endorsing energetic work and agreeing with everything old fashioned medicine has been about for thousands of years, but because nobody can make millions out of something we can all find for free, it's still largely derided and undermined. It can even help to heal the most heinous violations.<br />
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There was a time people laughed at Aromatherapy and Reflexology and before that, those who thought the world was round, but, nowadays, we all know better and, before long, the balance of mind, body and spirit - Holistic Health - will get its deserved due.<br />
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When it was time for me to leave this wonderful little rural retreat, after yet another lovely lunch, I felt inspired and free-er, softer and encouraged. Most importantly though, deep down inside, I can feel Midde Piccadilly hasn't left me. <br />
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Tomorrow, the final instalment in this set of posts, I'll talk about the generous discount that has been offered exclusively for my readers and a can't-wait-for-cookery book that Dominic Harvey, Eliana's son and resident chef, is about to launch.<br />
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Post 1 - <a href="http://www.oldersinglemum.com/2016/07/turning-back-time-to-middle-piccadilly.html" target="_blank">Turning Back Time to Middle Piccadilly Rural Retreat, Dorset.</a><br />
Post 2 - <a href="http://www.oldersinglemum.com/2016/07/middle-piccadilly-retreat-day-one-eat.html" target="_blank">Day One - Eat, Treatment, Sleep, Repeat.</a><br />
Post 4 - <a href="http://www.oldersinglemum.com/2016/07/exclusive-offer-for-stays-at-middle.html" target="_blank">Exclusive Offer for a Stay at Middle Piccadilly.</a><br />
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Disclosure - I was a guest of Middle Piccadilly for the purposes of this review, but, as always, all words and opinions are honest and my own.Older Single Mumhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16752771952921898184noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4611073670539883304.post-11823346270007878122016-07-12T09:00:00.000+01:002016-07-15T08:30:52.862+01:00Middle Piccadilly Retreat, Day One: Eat, Treatment, Sleep, Repeat. They warn you about it on their website nowadays:-<br />
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The Middle Piccadilly Story</h4>
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So we can meet your expectations and goals, please be aware that, however much we love traditional health spas, Middle Piccadilly is not a 5 star pampering spa, with fluffy robes, giant thelasatherapy jacuzzis and swimming pools... but you will get outstanding 5* therapies, comfortable guest accommodation, freshly created vegetarian cuisine, a charming rural setting and the peaceful ambiance that makes Middle Piccadilly truly unique!</div>
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You can imagine my surprise, therefore, when I was met by a fluffy robe, slippers in the wardrobe, and some gorgeous toileteries!<br />
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Whereas we used to be able to stay in the house - the actual absolutely idyllic little thatched cottage that is the heart of the retreat (pictured <a href="http://www.oldersinglemum.com/2016/07/turning-back-time-to-middle-piccadilly.html" target="_blank">on my post yesterday)</a>, European Law has decreed it to be a fire risk and seeing as it's listed, the necessary alterations to make it legally habitable by guests aren't actually allowed.<br />
<br />
Therefore, we can't sleep there anymore. The founding family either had to shut up shop or swap residences, so they moved out of their home which was on site anyhow, and we've moved into theirs!<br />
<br />
This meant a smaller room for me. A bit too small for my liking, to be honest. And a shared bathroom. Again, not ideal, but that's certainly not the case for them all. There are only six bedrooms in total (all charged at the same rate and allocated on a first come first served basis), two doubles, a twin and three singles, one of which has doors which opens on to the garden - I took a sneak peek while it was still empty - and the others are bigger. <br />
<br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjB4TRN1LjMFQkWIBEWrLxy4PPi7NYNjJJDrcZf3dKjLLQytYDmi6yZu9zpRJxVF_jsw59c1NG9QX5DwFL4cEqRsqI7Q6gKWmRhKxP7fSgyyvkB_-aSjMsbHvgzZeKW0MtqjD1MMcxYcVrk/s1600/collage+1.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img alt="middle piccadilly, rural healing retreat, dorset, " border="0" height="212" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjB4TRN1LjMFQkWIBEWrLxy4PPi7NYNjJJDrcZf3dKjLLQytYDmi6yZu9zpRJxVF_jsw59c1NG9QX5DwFL4cEqRsqI7Q6gKWmRhKxP7fSgyyvkB_-aSjMsbHvgzZeKW0MtqjD1MMcxYcVrk/s640/collage+1.jpg" title="middle piccadilly, rural healing retreat, dorset, " width="640" /></a></div>
<br />
Seeing as I was a guest of Middle Piccadilly and it was all a bit last minute on my side, there really wasn't anything to complain about. It was clean, with its own basin and tea and coffee making facilities and just across the way was a compact but comfortable 'Media Room' - the only place in the house with WiFi. The rest of it - including the quite-large-with-sunset-views communal sitting room - is a Digital De-tox zone.<br />
<br />
Talking of de-toxing, I was delighted that Dominic is, indeed, still doing the cooking and, yes, there really is such a thing as Cordon Vert cuisine! <br />
<br />
Nowadays they offer three choices of it - <a href="http://www.middlepiccadilly.com/food.html" target="_blank">Cleanse, Vegetarian and Raw Food.</a> They have also added a 'Living Smart Living Clean' programme - four to fourteen days of a combination of all three, together with tailor made holistic treatments.<br />
<br />
Best of all, I was delighted to see Eliana Harvey is still hands on at the Retreat. At age 86, she continues to teach workshops and is presently training up 17 Shamanic Therapists! Her husband, Jerry, isn't so well, but he's still there, aged 90. The whole family are incredibly inspiring examples of this kind of healthy living.<br />
<br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
</div>
Eliana took my initial consultation and gave me a different kind of food - the type for thought - asking what I wanted to get out of my short stay with them.<br />
<br />
The <i>very</i> short version is that I wanted to be less cross, more me. Oh and there was the matter of the head injury I sustained a few years ago, from which I've never fully recovered. And the usual feelings of (not necessarily just single) motherhood - overwhelm, anxiety, fatigue, frustration and never-ending guilt.<br />
<br />
It transpired these consultations can be a bit hit and miss and aren't necessarily included in certain packages but I think they're an integral introduction to getting the most out of a stay there. They kind of open up your mind to what matters to you and help to tailor the holistic treatments on offer.<br />
<br />
These vary from £35-£85 and inlcude facials, therapeutic massage and a body scrub as well as the more Alternative or 'Energetic' ones that you can't always get elsewhere. In my twenty odd years of exploring Natural Medicine, the therapists at Middle Piccadilly have always been of the most outstanding calibre and I'm pleased to say that there is never a 'push' or 'sell' of any description at any point, still.<br />
<br />
After a delicious dinner - a hot nut roast, new potatoes and ratatouille plus a chocolate pudding (or the raw versions for those who chose so) - I took a wonderful walk, watched the sunset and retired early ahead of my Spiezia Hand on Heart session the following morning. Everything was still and peaceful and felt home from home (well, apart from the still and peaceful bit, obvs!).<br />
<br />
The Blurb:-<br />
<br />
<span style="color: #562d59; font-family: "museo" , "helvetica" , "arial" , sans-serif; font-size: 1.4em;">Spiezia Hand on Heart</span><br />
<div style="border: 0px; color: #666666; font-family: Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 13px; margin-bottom: 5px; outline: none; padding: 0px;">
This treatment centres the mind with the body, sharpening awareness of the feelings and sensations stimulated during the slow rhythmic massaging of both hands and feet, enlivening the energy flow on the body. These massages are orientated towards a number of sensitive and powerful pressure points, which stimulate energy interactions throughout the body, releasing mental and emotional blockages. The treatment culminates in gently rebalancing the chakras.</div>
<br />
<table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgDt5X2HSvIUt_N1bRnaoUZDlDK6CeTOBZMUXIHrNsyvN8hNxIMf9CUdIFaZwaZX8sXFyis8gH9GksjB15R5701e7-VK0xpRslbiVrBLMT-MCse4sLnZcz8q1KpCZ0iFZU-4WoTloOCIfOe/s1600/13321811_10206571472669758_3012448448024045074_n.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="480" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgDt5X2HSvIUt_N1bRnaoUZDlDK6CeTOBZMUXIHrNsyvN8hNxIMf9CUdIFaZwaZX8sXFyis8gH9GksjB15R5701e7-VK0xpRslbiVrBLMT-MCse4sLnZcz8q1KpCZ0iFZU-4WoTloOCIfOe/s640/13321811_10206571472669758_3012448448024045074_n.jpg" width="640" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">The small spa room at Middle Piccadilly.</td></tr>
</tbody></table>
<br />
It takes place in a small spa room. The lights are dim, the candles are lit and the music is gentle Native American stuff - flutes and drums - which I fell in love with on my times here before.<br />
<br />
The Practitioner, Claire, was very intuitive, working on the hands up to the elbows and the feet up to the knees, on all the points and energy pathways that affect whole of the body. She could feels in hers what was going on in mine and you know you're with a good one when that happens.<br />
<br />
And there it was. In my abdomen . A great big fat ball of rage. <br />
<br />
I tried to transmute it and make light of it. I've known it's there, but have been too stubborn to want to shake it off. Things have been very hard as a single parent and sometimes I think perhaps it's the only thing that's kept me going!<br />
<br />
It's probably not very healthy, however neither was it going to disappear in an instant.<br />
<br />
It is said that there's nothing wrong with anger per se, it's how we use it that matters. It can move mountains and be used very beneficially, but I felt it was time to shift it now and I gave it a go.<br />
<br />
Afterwards, in my room alone as the work continued to take effect, I had a feeling I owed myself some compassion and that's not something that comes naturally to us Brits, but, again, I tried and think it helped somewhat.<br />
<br />
As is encouraged here, I slept afterwards. Eat, Treatment, Sleep, Repeat, is how it seems to go, with a wonderful walk around the village if you fancy if it's not raining, which it was when I was there, so I just went for more of the same.<br />
<br />
It's easy to see who the new guests are -they're comparatively loud! But it only takes a morning to get them into the Zen zone.<br />
<br />
Seeing as I was there, it wasn't walking weather and I liked and trusted the Therapist, I booked in for an Indian Head Massage, to see if it could help heal the concussion issues that still flare up. It appeared a bit steep at £65 but it was for the best part of an hour and, in retrospect, really was worth it. Cranio-sacral therapy and Acupuncture have made an enormous difference over the last couple of years, but I hadn't had the courage to try one of these until today. It felt like right thing to do and I was glad to have gone with my gut instinct. <br />
<br />
Tomorrow I would be in the good hands of the main lady and founder of Middle Piccadilly, herself, Eliana Harvey, for Shamanic Healing.<br />
<br />
In the meanwhile, another super supper was waiting without me having to lift a finger for it myself - always a plus!<br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
</div>
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<table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgmdVe0KQ0oPvVT5m8ErrVNHqi23POQejJLzuqSG30T7E9-pqJdCbs31MDR_Bjx-rAwgrwFVmry35u3gEn1h1GK7PjXVEbPtjRpOdKtyS8qc8M9QF1y4TBn-XL8rqc8r9fYcRxg6CVGyTRW/s1600/PicMonkey+Collage.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img alt="Middle Piccadilly, food at Middle Piccadilly, Dorset, Retreat, " border="0" height="210" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgmdVe0KQ0oPvVT5m8ErrVNHqi23POQejJLzuqSG30T7E9-pqJdCbs31MDR_Bjx-rAwgrwFVmry35u3gEn1h1GK7PjXVEbPtjRpOdKtyS8qc8M9QF1y4TBn-XL8rqc8r9fYcRxg6CVGyTRW/s640/PicMonkey+Collage.jpg" title="Middle Piccadilly, food at Middle Piccadilly, Dorset, Retreat, " width="640" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Not having to lift a finger for the excellent Cordon Vert cuisine at Middle Piccadilly.<br />
<br /></td></tr>
</tbody></table>
<a href="http://www.oldersinglemum.com/2016/07/turning-back-time-to-middle-piccadilly.html" style="background-color: white; color: #ff3d7f; font-family: Calibri; font-size: 15.4px; line-height: 21.56px; text-decoration: none;" target="_blank">Turning Back Time to Middle Piccadilly Healing Retreat in Dorset.</a><br style="background-color: white; color: #666666; font-family: Calibri; font-size: 15.4px; line-height: 21.56px;" /><br style="background-color: white; color: #666666; font-family: Calibri; font-size: 15.4px; line-height: 21.56px;" /><a href="http://www.oldersinglemum.com/2016/07/shamanic-healing-and-shamanka-school.html" style="background-color: white; color: #ff3d7f; font-family: Calibri; font-size: 15.4px; line-height: 21.56px; text-decoration: none;" target="_blank">Day Two: Shamanic Healing and Shamanka School.</a><br style="background-color: white; color: #666666; font-family: Calibri; font-size: 15.4px; line-height: 21.56px;" /><div>
<br /></div>
<div>
<a href="http://www.oldersinglemum.com/2016/07/exclusive-offer-for-stays-at-middle.html" target="_blank">Exclusive Offer for Stays at Middle Piccadilly.</a></div>
<div>
<br /></div>
Older Single Mumhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16752771952921898184noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4611073670539883304.post-83313842518220299522016-07-11T09:00:00.000+01:002016-07-15T08:29:15.562+01:00Turning Back Time to Middle Piccadilly Rural Retreat in Dorset.As I drove through deepest Dorset, I wondered if Dominic was doing dinner. He used to say he was a Cordon Vert cook, but I never knew if he was joking - whether there was actually such a thing as Vegetarian Cordon Bleu. The food was always fantastic though, so I'd figured it didn't really matter either way!<br />
<br />
It's been eleven years since I was last here, a small Healing Retreat just outside of Dorchester, in the South West of England and there were butterflies in my belly as I passed through tiny little villages, clocking castles and quaint cottages with thatched roofs, enjoying the greenery as far as the eye could see.<br />
<br />
There were massive trees making magnificent tunnels over lots of lush lanes and an abundance of flowers and fauna and fields. My third eye was throbbing as it soaked up the scenery. It felt like a real treat to be away and as though something special was already occurring!<br />
<br />
My children were at their father's for a few nights - for the first time for that length of time. I was going to need a powerful distraction and, by some weird yet wonderful quirk of fate, this perfect opportunity had presented itself when I'd been asked if I was interested in reviewing one of my all time favourite places in the world - <a href="http://www.middlepiccadilly.com/" target="_blank">Middle Piccadilly</a>.<br />
<br />
But would it be the same?<br />
<br />
I checked the web-site first. Yes, it was still owned by the founding family:<br />
<br />
<span style="background-color: #351c37; color: white; font-family: "museo" , "helvetica" , "arial" , sans-serif; font-size: 1.6em;">The Middle Piccadilly Story</span><br />
<div style="background-color: #351c37; border: 0px; color: white; font-family: helvetica, arial, sans-serif; font-size: 13px; margin-bottom: 10px; outline: none; padding: 0px;">
Middle Piccadilly was established in 1986 by founders Eliana and Gerry Harvey and started life as an innovative healing centre with emphasis on the holistic approach. Currently run by eldest son – Dominic and his wife Lisa - the centre offers over a quarter of a century of Natural Health Expertise and is the foremost Rural Retreat in the country.</div>
<br />
*Claps wildly. Can't believe luck*<br />
<br />
I've stayed here before, if my memory serves me correctly, three times. On the first occasion, I would have been alone, the second was with my ex-husband and the last time, was with one of my best girlfriends when I was pregnant with my eldest son.<br />
<br />
I wondered what would have happened to Eliana by now... She used to perform the most incredible Shamanic Healing treatments and was a wonderful teacher. She was getting on a bit before... <br />
<br />
I wondered if the treatments could be anywhere near as authentic as they used to be...<br />
<br />
Had they gone all mod cons and lost the rustic charm of their own quaint cottage with the thatched roof .... ? I couldn't imagine today's clientele putting up with pleasant but basic amenities, no matter how awesome the other stuff might be...<br />
<br />
And eventually I arrived to this place of tranquility and tenderness. The garden looked exquisite.<br />
<br />
<table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhYzzGwFB5CN6epLfD8bU7TZQpPb01hqscMYwE3w2PjGgOEkminH7wbEFUYOLz4RUVLG20Fh1GYJNj7mtuuC6BtqAfeJPVmI963BqqvZIddnDjLLFvNKRp7rOA070YtY32HJJ_BNu0HWutG/s1600/Middle+Piccadilly+Cottage+2.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img alt="middle piccadilly, dorset, rural retreat, " border="0" height="480" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhYzzGwFB5CN6epLfD8bU7TZQpPb01hqscMYwE3w2PjGgOEkminH7wbEFUYOLz4RUVLG20Fh1GYJNj7mtuuC6BtqAfeJPVmI963BqqvZIddnDjLLFvNKRp7rOA070YtY32HJJ_BNu0HWutG/s640/Middle+Piccadilly+Cottage+2.jpg" title="middle piccadilly, dorset, rural retreat, " width="640" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Middle Piccadilly Rural Retreat, Dorset.</td></tr>
</tbody></table>
You are allowed to arrive any time after 4pm, for a minimum stay of two nights. You leave after lunch on the last day around 2pm.<br />
<br />
This meant nigh on three whole days of nothingness, just birdsong and a couple of their signature holistic healing treatments.<br />
<br />
I wondered how it would it all work out...<br />
<br />
<a href="http://www.oldersinglemum.com/2016/07/middle-piccadilly-retreat-day-one-eat.html" target="_blank">Middle Piccadilly Retreat, Day One: Eat, Treatment, Sleep, Repeat. </a><br />
<br />
<a href="http://www.oldersinglemum.com/2016/07/shamanic-healing-and-shamanka-school.html" target="_blank">Day Two: Shamanic Healing and Shamanka School.</a><br />
<br />
<a href="http://www.oldersinglemum.com/2016/07/exclusive-offer-for-stays-at-middle.html" target="_blank">Exclusive Offer for Stays at Middle Piccadilly.</a><br />
<br />Older Single Mumhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16752771952921898184noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4611073670539883304.post-76909699740307927632016-07-04T14:53:00.000+01:002016-07-05T11:37:20.963+01:00Divorce and a Reduced Credit Rating.<div class="MsoNormal">
Some of you will know that I used to work in the money markets and might understand why the news of the UKs reduced credit rating as part of its 'Divorce' from the EU will have hit hard, but it didn't take me long to appreciate the irony. It's no different to a real life one!</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
So I wrote this: </div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj83-pG1DEG1G0gsYK_8uE7BajiFtOM6lQD4ZbEISwzBuOCCfsbClzA-Dr7DvEJt8oZX6wml2Kdx72z2NGJ5cMIemAmPuEvXXpG2rrqcwRb6QU7JWt92ckmNCNnTgThS_NL6Kkqsft1hvRT/s1600/brexit-world-media-reaction-eu_referendum.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img alt="brexit, " border="0" height="293" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj83-pG1DEG1G0gsYK_8uE7BajiFtOM6lQD4ZbEISwzBuOCCfsbClzA-Dr7DvEJt8oZX6wml2Kdx72z2NGJ5cMIemAmPuEvXXpG2rrqcwRb6QU7JWt92ckmNCNnTgThS_NL6Kkqsft1hvRT/s400/brexit-world-media-reaction-eu_referendum.jpg" title="brexit, " width="400" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Image credit: www.independent.co.uk</td></tr>
</tbody></table>
<div class="MsoNormal">
Oh the perils of Divorce.
No –one tells you what’s coming, how the ramifications will spread
farther than you can possibly imagine and how it will all get worse before it
gets better.</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
You find yourself on rocky territory, really quite isolated,
where you challenge yourself on the level of dissatisfaction of your marriage
and whether its disintegration was really worth all this uncertainty and
fear. <o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
Those that have been there tell you it will be worth it, but
it is a journey as yet unchartered and it’s something you simply have to
undertake once the decision has been made. <o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
Marriages fall apart for a myriad of reasons. Irritation, frustration and feelings of
suffocation are endured, perhaps on both sides, for so long that they become
habit and the union is possibly nothing more than a charade.<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
That doesn’t mean it doesn’t work for the others who
directly benefit from it. Where other
parties are involved, they’d quite prefer the status quo. Their world is considerably shaken when a
partnership is no longer what it was, but, like it or not, they will have to
adjust. <o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
It may have been many years coming to this point. No one leaves such a long-standing commitment
without a great deal of thought and consideration and courage. Little do they know how much longer they
will have to be brave for, how much strength will be required to stand firmly
by their feelings and how many changes will actually take place.</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
One of the most surprising things about a split is how
sharply and quickly your credit rating plummets. Where one was once considered of suffice
standing for any manner of affairs, one suddenly finds one is not. <o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
Those that matter support you and others who thought you
worthy anyhow come out of the woodwork to do so too. <o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
You find yourself in new relationships, more meaningful
ones. They are not necessarily easier,
but, at least they are, mainly, solid and sincere.<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
There are those who will come into the fray merely to exploit
your temporary vulnerability and a crisis of confidence will naturally
occur. Your newly honed instincts should
soon see them off for what they are.<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
You will have to face the party from whom you have chosen to
distance yourself and they will now show their colours for all to see. <o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
If they wanted to remain in the marriage for the right
reasons, they may choose to act with humility and exercise reasonable
negotiations, for which they will earn themselves some sympathy and your credit
rating will be questioned, but not too badly damaged. This is where the measure of sentiment can
make all the difference in the world.<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
If they are the clever sort – quietly controlling behind the
scenes of an externally presented picture perfect – and, despite their best
efforts, you have slipped out of their narcissistic remit, they will behave in
a way that –predictably – takes no responsibility whatsoever for the
breakdown. They will publicly point
fingers, laying blame at anyone’s door but their own. Your credit rating will swiftly become
negative. No-one likes nastiness. <o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
A break-up always affects more people than those instigating
it realise. They are just doing what
they think is the right thing and even though they may be worse off initially
and unexpected changes will surface daily, their belief in themselves and their
inherent decency means their credit rating can recover. <o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
It is those around them that matter. There are those who come forward because they
are now free from their previous situation.
What was once awkward or impossible becomes marvellous opportunity. Plus, there are those who have always stood
firm and, perhaps most valuable of all, there are those with experience who can
guide the way. <o:p></o:p></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal">
It may take more time than one envisaged at the start of
this new direction, but eventually, despite the perils of Divorce, everyone
finds their feet and, most cases, wouldn't look back!</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
(In this instance, I voted to Remain in the Union, but it was me who wanted to Leave my actual marriage and I'm finding it interesting to see the parallels in the pattern emerging of this metaphoric one. I identify completely with the chaos that has ensued since the decision to split was announced and might feel inclinced to continue to comment accordingly, so that the many lessons learned can be put to some use!).</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
Anya XX <o:p></o:p></div>
Older Single Mumhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16752771952921898184noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4611073670539883304.post-62381317253213550382016-06-13T21:43:00.001+01:002016-06-13T21:43:25.888+01:00My Beautiful 11 Year Old. <div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjNZSaXcFzKd15pZsJRc56qL1QVOdcGu3FFttOHTi_327uyf9NMxTo-s3yObh7cv4NLVg9DkXaVLdSstGIOST3MSajbZ9_XnXM8bhQRNSDZ04ylXub_oJH7gW472pmhTgBk7rtIX4nQDnNG/s1600/Rhys+11.+pm.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="478" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjNZSaXcFzKd15pZsJRc56qL1QVOdcGu3FFttOHTi_327uyf9NMxTo-s3yObh7cv4NLVg9DkXaVLdSstGIOST3MSajbZ9_XnXM8bhQRNSDZ04ylXub_oJH7gW472pmhTgBk7rtIX4nQDnNG/s640/Rhys+11.+pm.jpg" width="640" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">My eldest son, now 11.</td></tr>
</tbody></table>
My eldest son isn't here as I write. He's on yet another sleepover at yet another mate's house.<br />
<br />
The last time he went there on a Friday for a couple of hours whilst his little brother was at his Dance class and I worked late, he didn't actually come home until Sunday evening!<br />
<br />
He just tootles along at his own pace, humming his own tune, doing his own thing.<br />
<br />
As is right.<br />
<br />
It seems only five minutes since <a href="http://www.oldersinglemum.com/2015/05/today-you-turned-ten.html" target="_blank">the day he turned ten</a> and, oh my, how things have changed since then.<br />
<br />
All of a sudden he seems ready for Senior School, which is a good job because he'll be starting there soon! He's all grown up in some ways and still very young in others.<br />
<br />
He didn't want a party this year, but just to be at home with his brother and me. He asked his Godmother to make him his cake because she does them so brilliantly (think M&Ms secreted in the middle and spilling out when you cut them, something most mums can't compete with). I pretend to be offended but, really, I just want the best for him and, as a bona fide chef, she undoubtedly is that. <br />
<br />
He makes me very proud in so many ways - how he gets on with his work at school, how he works out a tune on his keyboard, how he ploughs through books at a rate of knots, how much he loves. He's very sensitive and kind and yet stroppy as a stroppy person in a strop can be. Can't imagine where he gets that from ;).<br />
<br />
I admire the fact he's feisty and sticks up for himself. It's something to encourage, not wanting him to be ridden roughshod over. His comebacks are brilliant.<br />
<br />
He has a beautiful singing voice, but is too shy to do much with it. The thought of it breaking..... well, let's not go there yet. <br />
<br />
He is a Gemini. So we have the both - the one who stands up strong, the other crippled with a lack of confidence. <br />
<br />
The answer is generally food. Like most other 11 year olds, his appetite is his main priority and from what I hear, this is how it will be from now on. He will be eating us out of house and home this summer and I fear it will be our last as just us.<br />
<br />
I will treasure our times down the beach together even more than usual, because he is going off into the big wide world from September. He has to travel by bus to get to his new school and will be increasingly independent. He'll be dressed in a blazer, have his own mobile phone and will make a lot of his own decisions.<br />
<br />
He'll make new mates for his little brother to torment with hugs. They will all be embarrassed as hell and, as a result, most of the sleepovers will happen elsewhere (with any luck!).<br />
<br />
But while he's here, still with us, still fairly little but almost as tall as me and his world still revolves around us, we are very blessed to know someone like him, very blessed by his company, very blessed in general.<br />
<br />
At the moment he's mad about James Bond films, since they started showing them on a Sunday afternoon on TV. I bought him the whole set seeing as he didn't want a party, but, technically speaking, he's not old enough to watch them all.<br />
<br />
And I find myself in a similar dilemma with his new bike. He now goes off on his own to his friend's house, which is hard when we've been a tight little unit for so long and done everything as one. But it's impossible to present him with it and ask otherwise. <br />
<br />
*Sigh* We're at that inbetween age, where he still needs his mum, but it's all on his terms now, not mine.<br />
<br />
It's all come too soon, but it's here and the tables turning isn't always a bad thing.<br />
<br />
Yesterday, he helped me a great deal, by putting his hands on what was a painkful ankle. He used his intuitive healing abilities to manipulate it a little, told me which way to turn it a bit here and there and before very long, it had clicked back into place. What a ruddy genius. I'd been limping all day!<br />
<br />
But that's my Beautiful 11 Year Old for you and the wondering what time he'll be home has begun!Older Single Mumhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16752771952921898184noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4611073670539883304.post-25348472796888507052016-05-31T08:00:00.000+01:002016-06-02T14:40:37.257+01:00Losing It.<div style="text-align: left;">
<br /></div>
A nice looking middle aged man wolfwhistled in my direction the other day.<br />
<div style="text-align: left;">
<br /></div>
<div style="text-align: left;">
As you do, I looked up, only to see him smiling his smiliest smile at another nice looking middle aged man slowly driving past me in a beautiful open topped BMW. </div>
<div style="text-align: left;">
<br />
<strike>FFS</strike>. For Heavens' sake. It comes to something when you're really that past it.</div>
<div style="text-align: left;">
<br /></div>
<div style="text-align: left;">
And I bumped into someone I haven't seen in ages recently.</div>
<div style="text-align: left;">
<br /></div>
<div style="text-align: left;">
'You look well,' she said.</div>
<div style="text-align: left;">
<br /></div>
<div style="text-align: left;">
'Fat,' I joshed. 'You mean I look fat. The middle aged spread is setting in.' </div>
<div style="text-align: left;">
<br /></div>
<div style="text-align: left;">
Looking me up and down, 'It suits you,' she said.</div>
<div style="text-align: left;">
<br /></div>
<div style="text-align: left;">
*Unfriends* *Pours away wine.*</div>
<div style="text-align: left;">
<br /></div>
<div style="text-align: left;">
Then my<a href="http://www.oldersinglemum.com/2016/04/to-my-darling-seven-year-old.html" target="_blank"> darling 7 year old</a> topped it off:</div>
<div style="text-align: left;">
<br />
<br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh1btfo9Ug49CS_TaVB-Qkoa2a6wpVH_l37xzNtdU41Y1eP6VebzuLgnRYmHeX3t5nkeprlBoki-XKvZ28F-KWGtLvVogPuyPgFlpfQ_EVjD_SONsdhB_vQ9gUnJRMUBhdAjEaI_KumvZGY/s1600/tweet.png" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="222" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh1btfo9Ug49CS_TaVB-Qkoa2a6wpVH_l37xzNtdU41Y1eP6VebzuLgnRYmHeX3t5nkeprlBoki-XKvZ28F-KWGtLvVogPuyPgFlpfQ_EVjD_SONsdhB_vQ9gUnJRMUBhdAjEaI_KumvZGY/s400/tweet.png" width="400" /></a></div>
<br /></div>
<div style="text-align: left;">
<br />
So that's all me put in my place for a while, hasn't it?<br />
<br />
I'm definitely losing 'it,' if, indeed I ever had it!<br />
<br />
How about you? </div>
Older Single Mumhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16752771952921898184noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4611073670539883304.post-19415296422680052462016-05-22T13:13:00.003+01:002016-05-22T21:51:05.391+01:00What I Saw Today. <table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjK7ug-1F2HPqY3q1JK-hPxA5JsIlrNL3zc-avtqlFHwzsdndbWbhQ2uDWryupifUzRV6q1gty7O5Yh8VxEooTNefz8bQUSTFF-CbKgSRw4Iu4izOdx5vqXNW79qm_qvgKP3DFZTkBhTdI0/s1600/sea+may+16.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img alt="sea, brighton, " border="0" height="478" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjK7ug-1F2HPqY3q1JK-hPxA5JsIlrNL3zc-avtqlFHwzsdndbWbhQ2uDWryupifUzRV6q1gty7O5Yh8VxEooTNefz8bQUSTFF-CbKgSRw4Iu4izOdx5vqXNW79qm_qvgKP3DFZTkBhTdI0/s640/sea+may+16.jpg" title="sea, brighton, " width="640" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Some of what I saw today. </td></tr>
</tbody></table>
As I strolled along a street in Brighton the other day, on my way to catch a bus, I saw a young blind man, leaning against a wall, chatting on his phone, while his companion waited patiently, clutching what must have been his white stick. <br />
<br />
At the end of this road - clearly in my view - was the way to the sea. I wondered how he felt about not being able to see the what I could and how it would feel to me.<br />
<br />
I could conjure it my mind's eye with the memory of many a walk taken and hundreds of hours spent just sitting and staring, but he might never have done either and, anyway, it's no real substitute. <br />
<br />
So, today, I looked with new eyes. Sat on the top deck, I watched it all away along the coast - the greys and greens, the hues of blues. Oh, how those of us who live here take it for granted. <br />
<br />
Once in town, I took more notice of other things too - the childrens' funny flip flops for sale on a stand, for example and the copious colours glaring and jumping out of the shop windows. What would normally jar, I rejoiced in, today, together with the pretty patterns on the beautiful clothes, the leaves on the trees and the sky - always a wonder - too.<br />
<br />
I took more time, slowed right down, paid more attention and appreciated what I saw.<br />
<br />
Once home, all chores were abandoned and I went to see the sea again, thinking of that young blind man - how he would feel the spray in the air, smell the seaweed and taste the salt. And a paramount part of the pleasure - how he would hear it.<br />
<br />
I hoped he could enjoy everything else - especially today. It was sunny and windy - my favourite, as each of the senses are truly tickled. I felt extra blessed and humbled for all five of mine.<br />
<br />
Later on, I lingered for longer at the trampoline as my son leapt about laughing. I watched his expressions of excitement and exhilaration and could feel healing in my heart.<br />
<br />
I gloried in the green of the grass and the garden, instead of worrying about the weeding and fretting about the stuff that forever never gets done.<br />
<br />
I watched the clouds at 9.30pm when it was still quite light. <br />
<br />
And on turning in, I lay there realising that perhaps I may not have two ha'pennies to rub together, but I am rich beyond measure.<br />
<br />
(Until next door's newly acquired cockerel kept cock-a-doodle-doo-ing and I've had to start all over again!).<br />
<br />
What will you see today?<br />
<br />
Anya xxOlder Single Mumhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16752771952921898184noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4611073670539883304.post-43874088785565701242016-05-16T08:00:00.000+01:002016-05-16T08:00:09.003+01:00Janet Jackson (reportedly) Pregnant at 49 and Other Stuff.Last week I was asked to write an article for Newsweek (no less!). It was about 'Older Mum' stuff in response to word on the street about Janet Jackson expecting a baby at age 49. This hasn't yet been confirmed but it hasn't been denied either, as the reporter pointed out in earnest as I tried to glean as much information as possible before rushing off something straight after work before the kids were whining for their tea. The result is below.<br />
<br />
I was rather proud they hardly edited a word, which kind of counteracted the lack of a fee and it really would be living the dream if, indeed, I had the nous to successfully manage both.<br />
<br />
Gingerbread also asked me to write a piece for them - ('inspiring Single Parent stuff') which I called <a href="http://gingerbread.org.uk/content/2173/The-dark-before-the-storm" target="_blank">The Dark before the Dawn</a> and BritMums recently hosted a piece I wrote about Blogging stuff -'<a href="http://www.britmums.com/2015/11/ploughing-furrow-staying-true-blogging-self/" target="_blank">Ploughing Your Own Furrow</a>.'<br />
<br />
So, it's not for lack of trying or completely out of the question, is it? But it's yet to happen!<br />
<br />
Someone who has always believed in me, however is the the lovely <a href="http://www.theworldaccordingtoizzie.co.uk/" target="_blank">Izzie Anderton</a> and I feel awful for not being around very much and to have let her down on the countless times she's tagged me on a variety of interesting posts, so I made a point of taking up the honour of being featured in her <a href="http://www.theworldaccordingtoizzie.co.uk/2016/05/the-blog-spot-interview-with-anya-harris.html" target="_blank">Blog Spot Interview'</a> last week, which was great fun and I wanted to show my appreciation of her support for my 'stuff' over the years.<br />
<br />
Anyway, back to the present point, I know some people who haven't lost hope of having a baby (or two) in their forties and although it's not ideal and people judge their motives, we don't really live in an ideal world. More by luck than anything else, I was fortunate enough to manage it and this is what I had to say on the matter:- <br />
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal">
<b>So rumours are rife about Janet Jackson having a baby about
a fortnight before her fiftieth birthday. </b></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<b><br /></b></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<b>How very dare she!<o:p></o:p></b></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<b><br /></b></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<b>But when is the ideal time to do so?<o:p></o:p></b></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<b><br /></b></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<b>Mine were born when I was 41 and 45, naturally conceived
within a (woeful) marriage and oh, how I regret all that energy expended on a treadmill
in my twenties and globe-trotting travelling in my thirties.<o:p></o:p></b></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<b><br /></b></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<b>(O.K. Not so much the
latter.). <o:p></o:p></b></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<b><br /></b></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<b>The truth is that behind every mum of a certain age, there
is a history of heartbreak. Rarely is it
intentional to have a baby just as we’re hitting the menopause and, believe you
me, the two combined is not as nature intended. <o:p></o:p></b></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<b><br /></b></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<b>Does that mean we shouldn’t do it, given the opportunity?<o:p></o:p></b></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<b><br /></b></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<b>Not necessarily, no.<o:p></o:p></b></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<b><br /></b></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<b>Does it mean we will be more tired? Probably.<o:p></o:p></b></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<b><br /></b></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<b>Does that make it illegal or immoral? Nope.<o:p></o:p></b></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<b><br /></b></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<b>What if we’ve yearned for children all our adult lives? </b><b>Does that make us wrong?</b></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<b><br /></b></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<b>Perhaps we’re more grateful than those who are thrust into
parenthood at an early age. </b><b>Perhaps
we’ve plenty to offer the little tykes who turn up at an age that other people
disapprove of.</b></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<b><br /></b></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<b>Perhaps it’s a massive mistake. Perhaps we should adopt one of the unwanted
or unfortunate. </b></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<b><br /></b></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<b>Perhaps not.</b></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<b><br /></b></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<b>They say ‘Man plans and Gods laughs.’ So it seems for women. <o:p></o:p></b></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<b><br /></b></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<b>And if you’re clever and work hard, before you know it,
you’ll be labelled a ‘Career Girl’ and everyone will assume you don’t want
children, you’ve made a choice. <o:p></o:p></b></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<b><br /></b></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<b>Perhaps not, again. <o:p></o:p></b></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<b><br /></b></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<b>I, for one, turned down opportunities to have babies with
reprobates when I was younger. As a
child of a single mother with a decidedly ropey relationship with my father I
didn’t fancy going it alone, didn’t think I could offer the best possible
upbringing for my children, didn’t think it was fair on them.<o:p></o:p></b></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<b><br /></b></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<b>And the irony? Even
at the ripe old age I am, decades later, I am doing it alone anyhow, s</b><b>tressed out of my skull trying to make ends
meet, bringing up two beautiful, bright boys, acutely aware it’s not the best
upbringing or fair on them.</b></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<b><br /></b></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<b>They excel at school though. </b><b>Why? </b></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<b>Perhaps being an older parent has its advantages. Perhaps I appreciate the value of an
education more than those half my age.<o:p></o:p></b></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<b><br /></b></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<b>They are fit and healthy despite me being comparatively
ancient when they came along. Why?<o:p></o:p></b></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<b><br /></b></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<b>They were the product of two perfectly good labours and
births without complications or stitches, because I was old enough to trust my
instincts, to see an Osteopath and an Acupuncturist all the way through my
pregnancies so that my babies and I would be in the optimum possible place for
when the time came and old enough to ignore the little whippersnapper nurses in
the ward who thought they knew better, yet hadn’t ever gone through it themselves.
<o:p></o:p></b></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<b><br /></b></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<b>Grrrrr.<o:p></o:p></b></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<b><br /></b></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<b>With age comes confidence. <o:p></o:p></b></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<b><br /></b></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<b>Not confidence in men, though. That‘s something else. I still have terrible taste in them. <o:p></o:p></b></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<b><br /></b></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<b>Perhaps, now, Janet Jackson is in a confident place. She’s enjoying her third marriage with a much
younger husband. Perhaps it’s the right
thing for them.<o:p></o:p></b></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<b><br /></b></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<b>Could she have offered a child a better life when she was
younger? <o:p></o:p></b></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<b><br /></b></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<b>Perhaps she needed time to find herself, having grown up as
part of one of the most famous families in the world. <o:p></o:p></b></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<b><br /></b></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<b>Perhaps now is the best time for her to devote her real self
to motherhood, because, ultimately, if you’re going to bring a child into the
world, the best gift you could ever give them is themselves too. <o:p></o:p></b></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<b><br /></b></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<b>Some of us take longer to get there than others, that’s all.
<o:p></o:p></b></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<b><br /></b></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<b>I wish her the very best of British.</b><o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<o:p></o:p></div>
<br />
<b>She’ll very likely need it! </b><br />
<b><br /></b>
<br />
<table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhnBB9R9SJe9wZ1b3x1Ji7LQLQubbgVdIA1mUX12qD0KMA0N5XlLUZTgVR2ByzU5Ji12_d6LtA1-KHByrAycdXKzt_g7fTP77T55L3HZKcsrg6hA6PRKRwamAf7jhU8sRZWn_VmCY486dkq/s1600/janet-jackson-pregnant.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img alt="janet jackson, pregnant at 49, " border="0" height="424" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhnBB9R9SJe9wZ1b3x1Ji7LQLQubbgVdIA1mUX12qD0KMA0N5XlLUZTgVR2ByzU5Ji12_d6LtA1-KHByrAycdXKzt_g7fTP77T55L3HZKcsrg6hA6PRKRwamAf7jhU8sRZWn_VmCY486dkq/s640/janet-jackson-pregnant.jpg" title="janet jackson, pregnant at 49, " width="640" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Janet Jackson allegedly pregnant at 49. Image from Newsweek / Getty. </td></tr>
</tbody></table>
<b><br /></b>Older Single Mumhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16752771952921898184noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4611073670539883304.post-18515562339205294622016-05-03T22:09:00.003+01:002016-05-03T22:09:52.945+01:00Win a Travel with Children Book by Lonely Planet.<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEig-RG5pCYmPxCUJTwiHTjFlLlZUB5sULBDhjuLVJS_z04pxFImlSKr8CTzYQambMONHTP4QDwlz75RDtwy3OzwMjBMs4LXFaxASGSsetQSXXpP4_KMNV064pJTEUCzLNfDTSHXh9llKkjK/s1600/Family+Travel+Show+2016.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="188" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEig-RG5pCYmPxCUJTwiHTjFlLlZUB5sULBDhjuLVJS_z04pxFImlSKr8CTzYQambMONHTP4QDwlz75RDtwy3OzwMjBMs4LXFaxASGSsetQSXXpP4_KMNV064pJTEUCzLNfDTSHXh9llKkjK/s640/Family+Travel+Show+2016.jpg" width="640" /></a></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<br /></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;">
Last year, at the Family Travel Show, I was delighted to see a stand by the very famous Lonely Planet people. Their books have been invaluable companions over the years to those of us who like to explore places abroad - going off the beaten track and living as the locals do. </div>
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<br /></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;">
Nowadays, of course they've gone all 21st Century with apps galore, giving invaluable up to date information and what-not-to-miss tips for almost anywhere you can think of and they have also moved with the times of their millions of devotees by encouraging us to continue to travel with our children. They sell our planet as anything but lonely - more of a huge opportunity for inspiring and inter-active adventure!</div>
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We spent much longer at their stand than at any of the others, perusing some of the samples of their 'Not for Parents' kids' books and willingly signed up to their newsletter which has been an absolute revelation with truly outstanding photography and enormously interesting and useful articles such as <a href="https://www.lonelyplanet.com/travel-tips-and-articles/tips-to-keep-your-family-healthy-on-the-road">Tips to keep your family healthy on the road</a>.</div>
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Today, I am giving away a copy of their Travel with Children book to a winner of the Rafflecopter competition below, but <a href="http://shop.lonelyplanet.com/" target="_blank">their shop </a>contains hundreds of travel titles and is chock-a- block full of ideas of where to go with or without a family in tow.</div>
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<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjvKQ3RmsP5TQbWopvbcsWrsqcT_Z94Fc5SmaMvHwjLMDbXMg-qB4meOpqSCwl3i6G60vntgQE-ZKvFmgQkYR8yubkpQyFfWblAgtw-Q8lPtn38qfyIlG1v70MELXHhx6GO65YYMqi0hZar/s1600/Travel+with+Children+Lonely+Planet+Book.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img alt="lonely planet, travel with children," border="0" height="400" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjvKQ3RmsP5TQbWopvbcsWrsqcT_Z94Fc5SmaMvHwjLMDbXMg-qB4meOpqSCwl3i6G60vntgQE-ZKvFmgQkYR8yubkpQyFfWblAgtw-Q8lPtn38qfyIlG1v70MELXHhx6GO65YYMqi0hZar/s400/Travel+with+Children+Lonely+Planet+Book.jpg" title="lonely planet, travelling with children," width="313" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">One of the many publications for travelling with children by Lonely Planet.</td></tr>
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This particular publication covers The Art of Travelling with Children - planning and packing with a world wide remit and a country by country guide - anywhere you can think of in Europe, as well as The Americas and the Caribbean, The Pacific, Asia, Africa & The Indian Ocean and The Middle East. If you don't want to stray too far from home, England, Ireland, Scotland and Wales are also included. </div>
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It made me want to just open it at random and follow wherever Fate led and gave me ideas for destinations that would never have, perhaps, entered my head - popping off to The Netherlands, for example - where 'The well being of children is a priority. They are welcome everywhere.' You can cycle, ice skate, take a boat on the canals (Teatime cruise on a pancake boat, anyone?) or visit a museum, of which, they tell, there are dozens. They advise us that the Maritime one has a pirate- led welcoming committee, the Rijksmuseum has incredible doll's houses and those such as the New Metropolis (NEMO) Science one have dedicated childrens corners and fun educational activities. Oh and let's not forget the Windmill and Tulip hunting they also recommend, all of which adds to the appeal of somewhere really quite easy to get to that most of us might not think of.<br />
. <br />
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If you <a href="http://www.lonelyplanet.com/kids/newsletter" target="_blank">sign up to their newsletter </a>you'll see the great offers to take advantage of when buying books and / or digital products (3 for 2 presently) and whether you're looking at going round the world or taking a short city break somewhere, it seems silly not to take them with you, as well as your kids! <br />
<br />
If you'd like to be in with a chance of winning a copy of this book then please complete the widget below and if you'd like to go to this year's Family Travel Show, it's 1st-2nd October at Olympia, London. <br />
<br /></div>
<a class="rcptr" data-raflid="a34b2b396" data-template="" data-theme="classic" href="http://www.rafflecopter.com/rafl/display/a34b2b396/" id="rcwidget_avd01vzc" rel="nofollow">a Rafflecopter giveaway</a>
<script src="https://widget-prime.rafflecopter.com/launch.js"></script>Older Single Mumhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16752771952921898184noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4611073670539883304.post-23848973200249186742016-04-25T08:00:00.000+01:002016-04-25T08:00:23.470+01:00To My Darling Seven Year Old.<h2 style="text-align: center;">
<b><i><span style="font-family: "times" , "times new roman" , serif;"><span style="background-color: white;">'Give me a child until he is seven and I will show you the man.''</span></span></i></b></h2>
<h2 style="text-align: center;">
<b><i><span style="color: #181818; font-family: "times" , "times new roman" , serif;"><span style="background-color: white; font-size: 14px; line-height: 21px;">(Aristotle) </span></span></i></b></h2>
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<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">The youngest turns seven. What kind of man will he be?</td></tr>
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<span style="background-color: white; color: #181818; font-family: "times" , "times new roman" , serif; line-height: 21px;">My darling youngest son turned seven last week. It seems inconceivable and, yet, right too. I'm actually surprised he has been so young for so long!</span></div>
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<span style="color: #181818; font-family: "times" , "times new roman" , serif;"><span style="background-color: white; line-height: 21px;"><br /></span></span></div>
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<span style="color: #181818; font-family: "times" , "times new roman" , serif;"><span style="background-color: white; line-height: 21px;">He is shooting up, almost as tall as his much older brother and is definitely the centre of our little family most of the time. </span></span></div>
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<span style="color: #181818; font-family: "times" , "times new roman" , serif;"><span style="background-color: white; line-height: 21px;"><br /></span></span></div>
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<span style="color: #181818; font-family: "times" , "times new roman" , serif;"><span style="background-color: white; line-height: 21px;">He remains loud, optimistic, characteristically good natured, a giggler and quite mischievous, but deeply caring and compassionate. </span></span></div>
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<span style="color: #181818; font-family: "times" , "times new roman" , serif;"><span style="background-color: white; line-height: 21px;"><br /></span></span></div>
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<span style="color: #181818; font-family: "times" , "times new roman" , serif;"><span style="background-color: white; line-height: 21px;">He still loves his dancing and drama classes and continues to wear out those of us who know him with his constant singing and inappropriate gymnastics. </span></span></div>
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<span style="color: #181818; font-family: "times" , "times new roman" , serif;"><span style="background-color: white; line-height: 21px;"><br /></span></span></div>
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<span style="color: #181818; font-family: "times" , "times new roman" , serif;"><span style="background-color: white; line-height: 21px;">Every day with him is a blessing and considering his start in life - with just me and my eldest and all our struggles to just get by in the early days - most of which he has, thankfully, remained oblivious to - he has nothing short of thrived. </span></span><br />
<span style="background-color: white; color: #181818; font-family: "times" , "times new roman" , serif; line-height: 21px;"><br /></span>
<span style="background-color: white; color: #181818; font-family: "times" , "times new roman" , serif; line-height: 21px;">He is an inspiration and to him I say this:</span></div>
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<span style="color: #181818; font-family: "times" , "times new roman" , serif;"><span style="background-color: white; line-height: 21px;"><br /></span></span></div>
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<span style="color: #181818; font-family: "times" , "times new roman" , serif;"><span style="background-color: white; line-height: 21px;">Thank you.</span></span></div>
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<span style="color: #181818; font-family: "times" , "times new roman" , serif;"><span style="background-color: white; line-height: 21px;"><br /></span></span></div>
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<span style="color: #181818; font-family: "times" , "times new roman" , serif;"><span style="background-color: white; line-height: 21px;">Thank you for coming, for everything you teach me, for the love you show to almost everyone you meet, for maintaining your innocence and zest for life to a degree that is utterly beyond comparison.</span></span></div>
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<span style="color: #181818; font-family: "times" , "times new roman" , serif;"><span style="background-color: white; line-height: 21px;"><br /></span></span></div>
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<span style="color: #181818; font-family: "times" , "times new roman" , serif;"><span style="background-color: white; line-height: 21px;">Thank you for making me laugh, for the persective you unwittingly and regularly grace us with, for looking after your good health and appreciating it even at your age and for your ability to count the smallest blessings as absolutely divinely given and important.</span></span></div>
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<span style="color: #181818; font-family: "times" , "times new roman" , serif;"><span style="background-color: white; line-height: 21px;"><br /></span></span></div>
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<span style="color: #181818; font-family: "times" , "times new roman" , serif;"><span style="background-color: white; line-height: 21px;">Thank you for insisting you choose your own clothes and sticking to your guns when you want to wear legwarmers or your jeans inside your socks so they look like them, for turning your nose up at trousers that aren't skinny enough and tops that just don't cut the mustard. Yo</span></span><span style="background-color: white; color: #181818; font-family: "times" , "times new roman" , serif; line-height: 21px;">u've always been cool, even before you knew what constituted it. And, rightfully, you're the one who decides what that is in your world anyhow. </span></div>
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<span style="background-color: white; color: #181818; font-family: "times" , "times new roman" , serif; line-height: 21px;"><br /></span></div>
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<span style="color: #181818; font-family: "times" , "times new roman" , serif;"><span style="background-color: white; line-height: 21px;">You'll make a wonderful man - if this is who you're going to be then - energetic, thoughtful and kind and never, ever boring. You're everything anyone could ask for. </span></span><br />
<span style="color: #181818; font-family: "times" , "times new roman" , serif;"><span style="background-color: white; line-height: 21px;"><br /></span></span>
<span style="color: #181818; font-family: "times" , "times new roman" , serif;"><span style="background-color: white; line-height: 21px;">And should you, one day, consider going out with less<a href="http://www.oldersinglemum.com/2015/10/my-sons-new-girlfriend-age-six.html" target="_blank"> girlfriends</a> and making a very lucky lady your wife, let's hope she will wholeheartedly accept your undying penchant for Superhero suits and poo jokes. </span></span><br />
<span style="color: #181818; font-family: "times" , "times new roman" , serif;"><span style="background-color: white; line-height: 21px;"><br /></span></span>
<span style="color: #181818; font-family: "times" , "times new roman" , serif;"><span style="background-color: white; line-height: 21px;">Lots of love, as always, Angel,</span></span><br />
<span style="color: #181818; font-family: "times" , "times new roman" , serif;"><span style="background-color: white; line-height: 21px;"><br /></span></span><span style="background-color: white; color: #181818; font-family: "times" , "times new roman" , serif; line-height: 21px;">Mummy xxx</span></div>
Older Single Mumhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16752771952921898184noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4611073670539883304.post-41410217431754625752016-03-21T08:00:00.000+00:002016-03-21T08:03:19.628+00:00Things That Mightily Please Me.Some of us just aren't meant for the high life, are we?<br />
<br />
After a week of things that <a href="http://www.oldersinglemum.com/2016/03/things-that-mightily-pee-me-off.html">mightily peed me off</a>, I was met instead with one full of pride and pleasing events, plus a little adventure that, perhaps, I'm not really cut out for thrown in for good measure! <br />
<br />
Firstly, my youngest son took part in a dance show at a major theatre in Brighton. He had a mini role as the only male in 'The Boy Does Nothing' and was like a little star amongst 15 (mainly much older) girls. He held his own without even a hint of any nerves and performed the splits to great gasps from the audience, which is probably the only time he's done at the right time in the right place. Generally speaking, it's something he slips into at the most inopportune moments.<br />
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<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgTNkbxfRt-hoEP_7J_2FA1DIo7V8E8kzS7aW_SYWYVNzhZWJ9OfQFwa3MF6ZL6TMUJmyWh5hJiUO47G8PVEiDT4Xk216Ki5L57CIeNHCXOeeVNnYnuI6HRVcx1ROubUbo9FZtPLkl5L5iz/s1600/splits.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="298" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgTNkbxfRt-hoEP_7J_2FA1DIo7V8E8kzS7aW_SYWYVNzhZWJ9OfQFwa3MF6ZL6TMUJmyWh5hJiUO47G8PVEiDT4Xk216Ki5L57CIeNHCXOeeVNnYnuI6HRVcx1ROubUbo9FZtPLkl5L5iz/s400/splits.jpg" width="400" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">The 6yo who loves doing the splits!</td></tr>
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And the following day, his older brother - by the far more reserved of the two - took part in a keyboard demonstration at their school, where a few of the children showcased what they'd been learning in their lunch time lessons there. It was a much smaller affair, but I was no less proud. He seems to have a real ear for music and such a tender touch when he plays that, despite him being a beginner, it brings me real joy.<br />
<br />
So, still on cloud nine after leaving the latter, I sauntered off to Waitrose, clutching some John Lewis vouchers I'd been given. It's not a normal haunt of mine and I was looking forward to feeling like I was living the high life for a little bit longer.<br />
<br />
But, honestly, it doesn't matter how hard I try to fit in to these posh places it's impossible not to let myself down. I needed the loo half way round and had to nip round the corner to a cafe and pretend to be looking for lost sunglasses, then I ran out of parking time before paying and had to dump the trolley at Customer Services for a second time in order to pop out to the car park and chat up the assistant. <br />
<br />
They were very polite while I explained my plights but it was obvious they thought I was one of those mad women who likes to pretend to do their shopping there and then scarpers without the goods, for which, admittedly, there is an attraction because it's like heaven in there, if one doesn't encounter the embarrasment and exhaustion generated by yours truly. <br />
<br />
It is very pleasing, therefore, that the children seem destined for the high life. Their mother is a lost cause!Older Single Mumhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16752771952921898184noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4611073670539883304.post-50554332396583045152016-03-10T19:02:00.001+00:002016-05-06T22:24:29.547+01:00Things That Mightily Pee Me Off. Last night, one of my Foreign Language students decided to change his bed. That's all well and good you might imagine, but seeing as he's leaving on Saturday, it mightily peed me off.<br />
<br />
This means I'll be washing and drying two lots of bed linen in two days instead of just the one. As well as that for the other four beds in the house over the course of the week.<br />
<br />
And as I emptied the washing machine, muttering under my breath but really making my displeasure possibly but politely quite clear to him, it became apparent that the load coming out - at 9.45pm - had been infiltrated by a tissue, with only me to blame.<br />
<br />
Aaaaaaaargh.<br />
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The other thing that compounds this little laundry-gate case is the backfiring of the bargain detergent I recently purchased in haste.<br />
<br />
The childrens' coats were spectacularly muddy so it seemed sensible to eschew the normal non bio / Eco stuff in favour of Surf, just at the beginning of half term. The boys went off to their dad's for a couple of days while I <a href="http://www.oldersinglemum.com/2016/01/being-back-at-work.html" target="_blank">went to work</a> and got everything ready for us all heading off to France for a bit. <br />
<br />
Then this happened.<br />
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<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">A rash from Surf laundry detergent.</td></tr>
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Aaaaaaaargh. The eldest and I came out in a rash - he on his arms and legs and I on my arms and neck. Not that we knew initially what had caused it. Seeing as they'd been eating with their father, it wasn't anything food related and it took a while to work it out.<br />
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Mentioning my theory at the office, however and popping some pics on Facebook confirmed it though. It seems lots of people react similarly to biological washing powders.<br />
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12 loads of re-washing later - over a period of almost a fortnight - with a different bottle of detergent and much more use of my tumble dryer than usual - cheap has most certainly not been cheerful.<br />
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And then I discovered some had got away. It was sat there smugly in my ironing pile - stuff that had not yet been done.<br />
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So that's the next lot in, after the student's stuff. And I'm grateful it surfaced before I'd gone to the effort of pressing it all, because if even more precious time and energy had gone to waste, that would have mightily peed me off as well!<br />
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*Pours a glass of wine to celebrate small mercies.*<br />
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What's been winding you up lately?Older Single Mumhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16752771952921898184noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4611073670539883304.post-15740606141114352532016-02-15T08:36:00.001+00:002016-02-15T08:47:52.879+00:00Out to Lunch.I was taken out to lunch on my day off last week. To a proper restaurant. With an actual gentleman.<br />
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He's married and he's a Vicar. He opened doors for me, entertained me with witty repartee, ordered splendid food and drink and paid the bill.<br />
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What more could a woman ask for on a Tuesday at 12.15?!<br />
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He wanted to pick my brains, as besides being a man of the cloth, he's also a comedy writer and, having retired from service in a very famous local church, he's wondering what else to do with himself.<br />
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I lent him Blogging for Dummies, talked about Twitter and listened to many a tale, plotting plenty of post titles for him as he regaled me: 'The Time I Met Tony Blair' 'My Dinners with Simon Cowell,' that kind of thing - all true - and felt very blessed to be in his company despite the absence of his clerical collar on this occasion.<br />
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He's a hoot, an experienced broadcaster and deserves a wider audience. There's talk of a book too, the title of which I mustn't reveal, but suffice to say it's hilarious and it would undoubtedly be littered with uproarious facts about families and humanity, considering the hundreds of weddings and funerals he has conducted.<br />
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The snippets I heard sure are stranger than fiction!<br />
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He's also a good cook and likes to talk recipes, so I reckon there's space for him and he'd be warmly welcomed as a writer in our midst.<br />
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What do you think?<br />
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<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjqQgwlvhfS3nzrVcMxr4mcq8_WKKpBMoT5OgMVj3wwDEoig2mmsfgMBJJB0nAvWbHzZ-szUfKJ-bK7I2cnFr895sHejeInrw9GZb59-tCv7zlTe_9cEaLTEp34LhKlXJQyqGuJEDHdNJ_0/s1600/father+martin.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="400" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjqQgwlvhfS3nzrVcMxr4mcq8_WKKpBMoT5OgMVj3wwDEoig2mmsfgMBJJB0nAvWbHzZ-szUfKJ-bK7I2cnFr895sHejeInrw9GZb59-tCv7zlTe_9cEaLTEp34LhKlXJQyqGuJEDHdNJ_0/s400/father+martin.jpg" width="298" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Father Martin Morgan, retired Vicar of St, Margaret's Church, Rottingdean. Out to lunch, in the nicest sense.</td></tr>
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Thank you Father Martin for your company, kindness, consideration and comedic take on life. Can't wait to do it all again.<br />
<br />
Anya xxOlder Single Mumhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16752771952921898184noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4611073670539883304.post-19769535344241067282016-02-08T08:18:00.000+00:002016-02-08T08:18:08.121+00:00Bye Bye Beautiful, Hello Gorgeous and Papa don't Teach!Last week saw the end of an era - I had to get rid of my beautiful car.<br />
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She's been ace for as long as I've been given her, which indeed I really was, because she was a trade for some building work my ex-husband did for some friends.<br />
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They'd had her since new and passed her on to me when they were upgrading.<br />
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This time, it was my turn to do just that, but not before she's given me long good service of around nine years!<br />
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<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjbAJGTacp9ZEGThseXrxn_uc3Kwbo5b1OCRROZfGhKXDKgGpjxSM0swfmstxK3fOIPWsaEaLB00cF6pqK9vERY3xF1GUCA6SPSBNM5R7xFw7dSisv0PIgtBsacKuQCSEBxdYCknVZB_oVK/s1600/ford+focus.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img alt="Ford Focus" border="0" height="298" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjbAJGTacp9ZEGThseXrxn_uc3Kwbo5b1OCRROZfGhKXDKgGpjxSM0swfmstxK3fOIPWsaEaLB00cF6pqK9vERY3xF1GUCA6SPSBNM5R7xFw7dSisv0PIgtBsacKuQCSEBxdYCknVZB_oVK/s400/ford+focus.jpg" title="Ford Focus" width="400" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">'Bye Bye Beautiful!</td></tr>
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I've loved her. She's never let me down, but she was getting old and a bit crunchy and not worth what it was going to take to get her through her MOT and even though this has been the case for the last couple, things felt different this time, so I bit the bullet and traded her up for a gorgeous little Yaris.<br />
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<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiIImGgu-ORzB4TMPH7SfsOqsk1M4NBO9HqWQu6WuTp_fuf01Tcf55fwXB9wL6RTjLUQRcLCgNOcpXL2MjxRsApHb-QUHlrcO7YYYdnc7IA6jg8K6vDxkh8-1ehXJ5C7-okCJDuoA-gU6S1/s1600/Toyota+Yaris.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img alt="Toyota Yaris, " border="0" height="300" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiIImGgu-ORzB4TMPH7SfsOqsk1M4NBO9HqWQu6WuTp_fuf01Tcf55fwXB9wL6RTjLUQRcLCgNOcpXL2MjxRsApHb-QUHlrcO7YYYdnc7IA6jg8K6vDxkh8-1ehXJ5C7-okCJDuoA-gU6S1/s400/Toyota+Yaris.jpg" title="Toyota Yaris," width="400" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Hello Gorgeous!</td></tr>
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I started off with two tiny Minis after receiving driving lessons from my step-dad on Sundays in a local supermarket car park. They were never allowed to open then in those days so it would empty with plenty of room to roam around and learn how to change gear!<br />
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And over a period spanning *crikey* thirty-three years, I gradually progressed to a Ford Fiesta, a VW Golf, a company convertible BMW and a Toyota MR2 sports car before the inevitable decline in engine capacity and status to another VW Golf, my beloved Ford Focus and now, my tiny Toyota.<br />
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It's funny how things come full circle and we've ended up with another small car, but it's perfect for my small family. It feels a bit like we're flying because it's light and it's an automatic and it comes with <a href="http://www.oldersinglemum.com/2015/05/our-mad-mini-adventure-abroad.html">a built in sat nav so we won't get lost next time we go to France!</a><br />
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And that's what swung it for me. She was so ancient that my RAC cover wouldn't stretch to looking after us should she break down abroad and travelling overseas by ferry is something we want to do more of.<br />
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Nowadays, people can't learn to drive in car parks and the cost of driving lessons has risen so steeply that some parents feel forced to take the stressful option of trying to teach their kids how to drive on the streets!<br />
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<span style="font-family: "times" , "times new roman" , serif;">I can't imagine what this must be like in today's busy world and it didn't occur to me that it might actually be more stressful for the Learner than the qualified driver but some research commissioned by <a href="http://carfused.com/">carfused.com </a>has revealed this to be the case. </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "times" , "times new roman" , serif;">They've released a video featuring <span style="background-color: white; color: #222222;">Sandra Dodson, from Sky TV’s Driving School of Mum and Dad,</span><span style="background-color: white; color: #222222;"> in which they </span><span style="background-color: white; color: #222222;">monitor the heart rate of a 17-year-old learner as she was taken out to practise driving with her father and then compared it with when she's learning with her. Sandra is a former deputy chief driving examiner at DSA, Driving Standards Agency.</span><span style="background-color: white; color: #222222;"> </span></span><br />
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<span style="background-color: white; color: #222222;"><span style="font-family: "times" , "times new roman" , serif;">Evidently, the stress levels monitored were higher with Dad in the passenger seat - shouting and grabbing the wheel - but they stayed high too vs. with an experienced instructor where they rose and fell depending on the challenges presented. Their point is that stressed and distracted drivers are more dangerous!</span></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "times" , "times new roman" , serif;"><span style="background-color: white; color: #222222;">The research about the rising cost of learning to drive </span><span style="background-color: white; color: #222222;">had a lot of pick up across national media channels such as BBC radio and the <a href="http://www.dailymail.co.uk/money/cars/article-3359502/Learner-drivers-fork-774-road.html">Daily Mail</a> an</span><span style="background-color: white; color: #222222;">d it makes fascinating reading - especially the bit where the youngsters become the designated drivers over Christmas!</span></span><br />
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I certainly couldn't have survived just on those lessons from my step-dad because families need to stay on speaking terms (!) but I still hear the advice of my Driving Instructor whenever I am reverse parking. The cameras in my new car are completely disconcerting and the <strike>annoying</strike> helpful lady who advises when we're over the speed limit is going to take some getting used to. She feels like a parent beside me anyhow!<br />
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Here's the video below. How do you feel about your experiences of learning to drive and your various cars over the years?<br />
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<br />Older Single Mumhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16752771952921898184noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4611073670539883304.post-15969699596383859612016-01-29T07:00:00.000+00:002016-02-07T11:50:01.749+00:00 Win £150 John Lewis Vouchers for De-Cluttering Top Tips with Everest.So the word on the street this month has included a great deal about de-cluttering our homes, our lives, our friendships and, consequently our minds.<br />
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And there's no denying how much more space can be created in a relatively short space of time once we actually try it.<br />
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My top tips for de-clutterinng would be to:<br />
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1) Tackle things ten minutes at a time. A drawer a day or washing down a wall can give you incredible impetus for tomorrow, or *gasp* even another ten minutes.<br />
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2) Leave off the wine until afterwards. It's amazing how 'tired' you can feel after a glass or two and how tempting it can be to leave even the ten minute tackling until tomorrow.<br />
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3) Reward yourself. Write a list of your achievements / dream de-cluttering jobs downsized into very small chunks and you'll be amazed how much you can achieve by the end of a day / week / week or two.<br />
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4) Believe in a place for everything and everything in its place. Friends who have actually visited my house may be surprised by my advising anything in this regard, seeing as it's not exactly the most organized-appearing place to be, however there is a lot to be said for organized chaos. I can put my hands on almost anything I'm looking for because, even at worst, there's an area for everything and and everything in its area! Work stuff on my desk, dastardly school paperwork on the kitchen side, non-work to-do on top of the microwave. <br />
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5) Use files. Years of office work means appreciating the simplicity of segragating and sorting. One file for Instructions, another for receipts and guarantees, another for finances, others for important documents, sentimental stuff and the like. Whatever works for you.<br />
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6) Be ruthess. Get rid of the kids' broken and outgrown toys when they're not around. Don't even entertain the idea of getting them involved. They'll suddenly want to play with everything they haven't touched in years. You know best.<br />
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7) Try to stay on top of things. It's very easy to let piles of this and that build up again once you've cleared away your *cough* areas, especially if it's an ongoing job and you're focused elsewhere, but it's best to be happy with one room than unhappy with them all, so set small targets and give yourself credit for each little achievement.<br />
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The great thing about Everest Home Improvements <a href="http://www.everest.co.uk/doors/bi-fold-doors/aluminium/" rel="nofollow">bi-fold doors</a> is that the feeling of space you create - physcially first, followed inevitably by mentally - is that they allow you to go even further by enhancing the illusion of it in fine style. Check these out. What's not to like?!<br />
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<table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj-cmz2gWhifWeIkjxiKh2F4YyW1-EgdP4rANfc9hyPrd9JUZPojOUvYKEMeafhUU9m5BAMt9IzcOGDO-N-tRLUswbQfyB9oER2Tb9aug5d-w6xTZ2xwbK8k-Z5pFeO_df1SCWrFLF3ANBx/s1600/everest+bi+fold+doors.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="624" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj-cmz2gWhifWeIkjxiKh2F4YyW1-EgdP4rANfc9hyPrd9JUZPojOUvYKEMeafhUU9m5BAMt9IzcOGDO-N-tRLUswbQfyB9oER2Tb9aug5d-w6xTZ2xwbK8k-Z5pFeO_df1SCWrFLF3ANBx/s640/everest+bi+fold+doors.jpg" width="640" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Everest bi-fold doors giving the illusion of even more space than the lack of clutter does. </td></tr>
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And today, they're generously giving away £150 of John Lewis vouchers to a lucky winner of our Rafflecopter competition.<br />
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All we ask is that you leave your own top tip for de-cluttering in the comments via the Rafflecopter giveaway widget below and the winner will be chosen at random. Additional entries are optional. <br />
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Good luck!<br />
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<a class="rcptr" data-raflid="a34b2b395" data-template="" data-theme="classic" href="http://www.rafflecopter.com/rafl/display/a34b2b395/" id="rcwidget_g9dh6h9d" rel="nofollow">a Rafflecopter giveaway</a>
<script src="https://widget-prime.rafflecopter.com/launch.js"></script><br />
<br />
And the winner is Lisa Rowsell (@Lisa2062). Many, many congratulations and thank you everyone for entering :)).Older Single Mumhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16752771952921898184noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4611073670539883304.post-71971976207726690642016-01-26T21:51:00.000+00:002016-01-27T08:05:27.686+00:00Why Plastic's Not Fantastic and Three Little Things by Atlanta Cook.<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "times" , "times new roman" , serif;">You know when you meet someone and you only know them as a mum, but, gradually, over time, the pretty awesome person they are underneath gradually emerges? Well, this has happened with a friend of mine called Atlanta Cook. Following her Facebook posts has really opened my mind to the perils of plastic. </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "calibri" , sans-serif;">There was one picture in particular, much like this one underneath, that really resonated with my soul. She was way ahead of the pack when it came to carrier bags and continues to campaign to reduce the amount of plastic in our oceans and generally what has become our addiction to it. </span></span><br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg4grXb8x0Ph_QcC8xNAX96HfO4DeRoZlXQJs_pJRtSXFlr0empvyLO8CPzdGWBaO5LAwMeDzAK8kWFO3p82vTUUeTg-6nDDsWnPVUGK1wGVwslLlkj6uvyQKcn5SbLzNAzlrGZU-HCDY56/s1600/ColonyDetritus0728.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><span style="font-family: "times" , "times new roman" , serif;"><img border="0" height="240" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg4grXb8x0Ph_QcC8xNAX96HfO4DeRoZlXQJs_pJRtSXFlr0empvyLO8CPzdGWBaO5LAwMeDzAK8kWFO3p82vTUUeTg-6nDDsWnPVUGK1wGVwslLlkj6uvyQKcn5SbLzNAzlrGZU-HCDY56/s400/ColonyDetritus0728.jpg" width="400" /></span></a></div>
<span style="font-family: "times" , "times new roman" , serif;"><span style="font-family: "times" , "times new roman" , serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: "times" , "times new roman" , serif;"><span style="font-family: "calibri" , sans-serif;"><br /></span></span><span style="background-color: white; color: #212121; font-size: 15px;">I implore you to watch the video she has shared below and to consider the three little things she suggests we can all do to reduce our consumption on a small, daily basis. To be honest, they seem too small when you see the scale of things, how far reaching the problem is and what else could be done, but </span></span><span style="background-color: white; color: #212121; font-family: "times" , "times new roman" , serif; font-size: 15px;">I've been so impressed with Atlanta's work, that I asked her to write something for us all and she has kindly done so:</span><br />
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<table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi0-rtO-puortyaPXt3IXruSXpCVls8sqR53RSECD8tnInKHXkV-jYN8z-qWYzo3_AjvE8DBPr7Oo2qzGVdwxNMZnP6Rhy0hyWCuTA8QT9nC_umh1IUkcWtgRrYFQQB0vK7B3OYlPx5sVkx/s1600/unnamed+%25281%2529.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><span style="font-family: "times" , "times new roman" , serif;"><img alt="atlanta cook, plastic's not fantastic, " border="0" height="400" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi0-rtO-puortyaPXt3IXruSXpCVls8sqR53RSECD8tnInKHXkV-jYN8z-qWYzo3_AjvE8DBPr7Oo2qzGVdwxNMZnP6Rhy0hyWCuTA8QT9nC_umh1IUkcWtgRrYFQQB0vK7B3OYlPx5sVkx/s400/unnamed+%25281%2529.jpg" title="atlanta cook, plastic's not fantastic, " width="300" /></span></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;"><span style="font-family: "times" , "times new roman" , serif; font-size: small;">Atlanta Cook, Marine Environment Consultant.</span></td></tr>
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<span style="font-family: "times" , "times new roman" , serif;">Did you know that buying natural products supports Nature herself?</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "times" , "times new roman" , serif;"><br /></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "times" , "times new roman" , serif; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">Ergo, buying plastic products supports fossil fuel consumption =
destruction of forests, mountains, water aquifers, streams, rivers, oceans, the
Arctic! Hmmm, a bit heavy I know, but true none the less! But don’t worry, because solutions to plastic
pollution are both simple and available to all.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "times" , "times new roman" , serif;"><br /></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "times" , "times new roman" , serif; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">Almost 200 nations around the Earth recently signed a Climate Change treaty
in Paris that puts fossil fuels where they belong, in history. The people have spoken and they want cleaner
renewable energy and carbon capture technologies that reduce the level of CO2
in our atmosphere.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "times" , "times new roman" , serif;"><br /></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "times" , "times new roman" , serif; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;"><b>The bigger picture: </b><o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "times" , "times new roman" , serif; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">Industrial Age (extract & burn fossil fuels to power
machines) <o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "times" , "times new roman" , serif; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">Plastic Age (mass produce products from fossil fuel
derivatives) <o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "times" , "times new roman" , serif;"><br /></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "times" , "times new roman" , serif; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">Information Age (world wide web spreads plastic pollution observations,
we wake up and realise we can't eat or drink fossil fuels and they are
destroying our planet)<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "times" , "times new roman" , serif;"><br /></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "times" , "times new roman" , serif; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">Sustainable Age (the people demand transition to renewable energy
to replace fossil fuels)<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "times" , "times new roman" , serif;"><br /></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "times" , "times new roman" , serif; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">Now we finally have a world agreement to work towards the
reduction of carbon dioxide in the Earth’s atmosphere, it’s time for us all to
act. Divesting from fossil fuel by
products, aka plastics is a great place to start. Switching your home energy supplier to
Ecotricity or Good Energy is also a fantastic way to support renewable energy. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "times" , "times new roman" , serif;"><br /></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "times" , "times new roman" , serif;"><b><span style="font-family: "times" , "times new roman" , serif; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">But it's
the little things in life too. </span></b><b><span style="font-family: "times" , "times new roman" , serif; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">Small
things matter - and to anyone who says they don't, just remind them what it's
like spending the night in a room with a mosquito! </span></b></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "times" , "times new roman" , serif;"><br /></span></div>
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<b><span style="font-family: "times" , "times new roman" , serif; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">Even tiny changes add up.</span></b><br />
<span style="font-family: "times" , "times new roman" , serif;"><b><span style="font-family: "times" , "times new roman" , serif; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;"><br /></span></b>
<b><span style="font-family: "times" , "times new roman" , serif; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">We
are mothers, we are teachers, we are beautiful, wonderful creatures - </span></b><b><span style="font-family: "times" , "times new roman" , serif; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">Keep Calm & Go Natural!</span></b></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "times" , "times new roman" , serif;">This beautiful short film tells just one story of the effects of our Plastic Addiction on Midway Island's bird population. </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "calibri" , sans-serif; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">We all play a part in this story of pollution and change. All our
actions have an effect in the wider world and small changes that we make
are like ripples in a pond created by a tiny pebble - they expand and grow,
reaching to the furthest edges. <o:p></o:p></span></span><br />
<span style="font-family: "times" , "times new roman" , serif;"><br /></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "times" , "times new roman" , serif; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">
There's no better place to Go Natural to Support Nature than in your home. The
pulsing heart of your family, where you teach your children how things are, and
how thing should be.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "times" , "times new roman" , serif;"><span style="font-family: "calibri" , sans-serif; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;"><br />
By making tiny changes in your shopping habits you can support Nature and teach
the principles of sustainable living to your whole family. These three little things require</span><span style="font-family: "calibri" , sans-serif;"> no great effort on anyone's behalf but the effects are great.</span></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "times" , "times new roman" , serif;"><o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "times" , "times new roman" , serif; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;"><b><br />
<!--[endif]--><o:p></o:p></b></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "times" , "times new roman" , serif; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;"><b>1) A bar of soap in a pretty dish</b><o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "times" , "times new roman" , serif;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "times" , "times new roman" , serif; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">By swapping your plastic hand soap dispensers the environment
reaps three rewards. Firstly, approx. 6 (1 every 2 months) plastic dispensers
per year will not end up in landfill sites or incinerators, or 6 non-recyclable
pump tops if you recycle the bottles. Secondly, the fossil fuel resources used
to create these dispensers will not be needed, and lastly, the green-house
gases, chemical & plastic pollution created during the extraction of the
resources, the production process and disposal of those 6 plastic dispensers will
not released in to the environment. Win win win :)<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "times" , "times new roman" , serif;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "times" , "times new roman" , serif; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">That's quite a lot of change and you're only doing what you did
before plastic hand soap dispenser became the 'fashion' back in the mid 90s.
But what's really powerful is imagining what would happen if you did that
for the whole of your adult life, 6 dispensers per year times 65 years! That's
390 dispensers you haven't bought and thrown away! Now imagine all your
neighbours doing the same! The scale of this change is pretty epic
right? <o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "times" , "times new roman" , serif;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "times" , "times new roman" , serif; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;"><b>2) A wooden washing up brush </b><o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "times" , "times new roman" , serif;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "times" , "times new roman" , serif; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">Since 1995 I have been using wooden washing up brushes and have
bought them as presents for many of my friends. Some of <a href="http://www.steenbergs.co.uk/product/572/wooden-washing-up-brush-with-4-extra-heads/19/31" rel="nofollow">them come with 4 replaceableheads. </a>I only disposed of my original 1995 handle on our camp fire last year!
Through this tiny act I have stopped around 40 (2 per year) plastic washing up
brushes going in to landfill or being incinerated between 1995-2015. I'm not
sure how many of my friends continue to use the ones I bought them, but I've
given at least 20 as presents over the years, so 20 times the 5 brush heads is
another 100 plastic washing up brushes that have not needed to be created or
destroyed. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "times" , "times new roman" , serif;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "times" , "times new roman" , serif; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">The wooden ones are made using sustainably sourced wood and cactus
fibre bristles, and they end their life as fire wood or compost. What's not to
like? <o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "times" , "times new roman" , serif;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "times" , "times new roman" , serif;"><br /></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "times" , "times new roman" , serif;"><b>3) Cotton buds</b></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "times" , "times new roman" , serif;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "times" , "times new roman" , serif; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">Replacing your existing brand could have a huge benefit to Nature.
What's different I hear you say? Not much, just a cardboard stick that doesn't
end up as plastic pollution on our beaches! And no plastic box or tub that ends
up in a landfill site or incinerator. During one of the beach cleans I
organised last summer I found 43 plastic cotton bud sticks just in the small
area where I was standing handing out the equipment and looking after people's
bags. I was shocked, as I realised that people are flushing them down their
toilets! After each heavy rain storm they flood through the Combined Stormwater
Overflows and end up on our beaches, yuk!<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "times" , "times new roman" , serif;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "times" , "times new roman" , serif; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">Dental floss handles are another menace that have started to
appear on our beach cleans over the last 8 years or so!<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "times" , "times new roman" , serif;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "times" , "times new roman" , serif; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">According to <a href="http://www.sas.org.uk/" rel="nofollow">Surfers Against Sewage</a>'s Marine Litter Report and the
Marine Conservation Society's Beachwatch Survey, plastic pollution of the seas
and beaches has increased by over 100% in the last 15 years - and most of it
(over 40%) is dropped or flushed by us!</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "times" , "times new roman" , serif;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "times" , "times new roman" , serif; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">It doesn't have to be this way. We can change things for the
better by buying natural products. Cotton buds with wooden or cardboard sticks
are easily available. </span></div>
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<table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhCbhtmXT0l435tOHXMF5u9jZjiibA2dY0ZTmzK32YO0ZwNQ22Niorc4_C14NMPvsbrAlNLm75PCeSyUI1WagUDsH8aiVHnoTCtuofahV0nmuUEV0igOEzrZIqMLI39cmTwb3dG6_9-9neA/s1600/d8c88331-aac0-4213-9599-e0052a8ec320.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><span style="font-family: "times" , "times new roman" , serif;"><img alt="atlanta cook, plastic's not fantastic, " border="0" height="400" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhCbhtmXT0l435tOHXMF5u9jZjiibA2dY0ZTmzK32YO0ZwNQ22Niorc4_C14NMPvsbrAlNLm75PCeSyUI1WagUDsH8aiVHnoTCtuofahV0nmuUEV0igOEzrZIqMLI39cmTwb3dG6_9-9neA/s400/d8c88331-aac0-4213-9599-e0052a8ec320.jpg" title="atlanta cook, plastic's not fantastic, " width="300" /></span></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;"><span style="font-family: "times" , "times new roman" , serif; font-size: small;">Found in a few minutes during one of Atlanta's organized beach cleans.</span></td></tr>
</tbody></table>
</div>
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<span style="font-family: "times" , "times new roman" , serif;">The main Three Little Things you can do, however, is to teach your family the 3
Rs: </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "times" , "times new roman" , serif; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;"><br /></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "times" , "times new roman" , serif; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;"><b>REDUCE the amount of plastic you buy.<o:p></o:p></b></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "times" , "times new roman" , serif;"><b><br /></b></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "times" , "times new roman" , serif; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;"><b>RE-USE what you have already bought.<o:p></o:p></b></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "times" , "times new roman" , serif;"><b><br /></b></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "times" , "times new roman" , serif; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;"><b>RECYCLE what you can't use again. </b><o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "times" , "times new roman" , serif; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;"><br /></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "times" , "times new roman" , serif;">I<span style="font-family: "times" , "times new roman" , serif;">n short, plastic's not fantastic!</span></span><br />
<span style="font-family: "times" , "times new roman" , serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: "times" , "times new roman" , serif;">For more information -</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "times" , "times new roman" , serif;"><br /></span>
<a href="http://storyofstuff.org/" style="font-family: Times, 'Times New Roman', serif;"><span style="font-family: "times" , "times new roman" , serif;">The Story of Stuff</span></a></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "times" , "times new roman" , serif;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "times" , "times new roman" , serif; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;"><a href="http://www.plasticsoupfoundation.org/en/">Plastic Soup Foundation</a><o:p></o:p></span><br />
<span style="font-family: "times" , "times new roman" , serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: "times" , "times new roman" , serif;"><a href="https://www.facebook.com/Atlanta-Cook-Marine-Environment-Consultancy-1162892113750750/?fref=ts">Atlanta's FB Page.</a></span>
<a href="http://www.atlantacook.co.uk/"><span style="font-family: "times" , "times new roman" , serif;">Atlanta Cook Marine Environment Consultancy</span></a></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "times" , "times new roman" , serif;"><span style="font-family: "times" , "times new roman" , serif;">email: </span><a href="mailto:info@atlantacook.co.uk" style="background-color: white; color: #1155cc;" target="_blank"><span style="color: blue;"><span class="il">info@atlantacook.co.uk</span></span></a></span><br />
<span style="font-family: "times" , "times new roman" , serif;">LinkedIn- <a href="https://www.linkedin.com/in/atlanta-cook-23730417">https://www.linkedin.com/in/atlanta-cook-23730417</a></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "calibri" , sans-serif; font-size: 11.0pt;"><o:p></o:p></span></div>
Older Single Mumhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16752771952921898184noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4611073670539883304.post-51973267624659234232016-01-21T17:04:00.000+00:002016-01-21T17:04:19.614+00:00Boys Bedroom Ideas with Homify.I mentioned the other day how things are a-changing round here. The boys are growing up, their needs are altering and their tastes are bound to follow.<br />
<br />
The eldest has so far refused to lose the Winnie the Pooh theme they have in their room though. I first mooted the idea a few years ago, but he's steadfast, despite the fact he will be starting senior school in September!<br />
<br />
Not for him the nice blue room with rockets that I've suggested, deliberately shying away from the Cars (yes, our conversations have been occurring that long!) and Minions and Star Wars stuff that will date, but I fear we may have missed our moment even with those now that they are approaching 11 and seven?<br />
<br />
It's obvious what's going to happen however. There will be a very sudden demand for it all to be done in an instant and I'm beginning to get nervous about it, so it seems sensible to start exploring <a href="https://www.homify.co.uk/rooms/nursery-kid-s-room" target="_blank">boys bedroom ideas</a>.<br />
<br />
I'm not a creative sort. Nor is it like me to be ahead of the game. Everything always comes as a surprise - when the children grow, for example, need new shoes, food in the fridge, get girlfriends, blah blah, but even I can anticipate the inevitable seismic shift in attitude that will come over the summer holidays at the very latest.<br />
<br />
If the youngest had his way, Winnie the Pooh would have been replaced by now, but it's heartening that his brother is so sentimental.<br />
<br />
We'll keep their beautiful pine bunk beds and chests of drawers, bought with the sale of all my jewellery a few years ago and although, in an ideal world they wouldn't still be sharing the same bedroom, they seem to enjoy it and, for now, they do, so we need to find something that caters for both their tastes whilst keeping a keen eye on what their future ones might incorporate.<br />
<br />
And in the meanwhile, my little plan to work extra hours and lose one of our students will free up another bedroom at some point and this will give us a completely clean slate to work with. We might go all white with that one, although my son would probably prefer not!<br />
<div style="color: #86848b;">
</div>
<br />
<table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://www.homify.co.uk/photo/694656/modernes-wohngefuehl-frei-geplantes-kundenhaus" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;" target="_blank"><img alt="Modern nursery/kids room by FingerHaus GmbH" src="https://res.cloudinary.com/homify/a_0,c_fill,h_316,q_70,w_316/v1441063040/p/photo/image/694656/FGsch_KiZi_pr.jpg" title="boys bedroom ideas, " /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">My taste.</td></tr>
</tbody></table>
<div>
<table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://www.homify.co.uk/photo/79622/modernes-hochbett-mit-schreibtisch-von-dearkids" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;" target="_blank"><img alt="Modernes Hochbett mit Schreibtisch von dearkids : Modern nursery/kids room by MOBIMIO—Räume für Kinder" src="https://res.cloudinary.com/homify/a_0,c_fill,h_316,q_70,w_316/v1437592498/p/photo/image/79622/Hochbett_mit_Schreibtisch_dearkids_.jpg" title="boys bedroom ideas, " /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">My son's preference!</td></tr>
</tbody></table>
<div>
<table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://www.homify.co.uk/photo/671778/amenagement-d-un-appartement-de-70m-paris" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;" target="_blank"><img alt="Modern nursery/kids room by MadaM Architecture" src="https://res.cloudinary.com/homify/a_0,c_fill,h_316,q_70,w_316/v1441021994/p/photo/image/671778/IMG_8938.jpg" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Our possible happy compromise!</td></tr>
</tbody></table>
</div>
<div style="color: #86848b;">
<div style="color: #86848b;">
In the second scenario at home, the bed above a desk look will be a winner because they make the best use of space, plus the would be teenager will need a sanctuary for his homework.</div>
<br />
And you're never too old for one of these, surely? I've always fancied a Lego wall for them, but they'd probably have a lot of fun with a blackboard one! <br />
<div style="color: #86848b;">
<br /></div>
</div>
</div>
<div>
<table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://www.homify.co.uk/photo/475502/kinderzimmer" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;" target="_blank"><img alt="Kinderzimmer : Modern nursery/kids room by SEHW Architektur" src="https://res.cloudinary.com/homify/a_0,c_fill,h_316,q_70,w_316/v1439294135/p/photo/image/475502/SUE09005_25.jpg" title="boys bedroom ideas, " /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Are you ever too old for fun with this?<br />
<div style="text-align: left;">
<br /></div>
</td></tr>
</tbody></table>
</div>
Whatever happens, Winnie the Pooh won't be on it!<br />
<br />
<span style="font-family: "times" , "times new roman" , serif;"><b>Disclosure -</b> this is a collaborative post with Homify, </span><span style="background-color: white; color: #222222; font-family: "times" , "times new roman" , serif;">an online platform for home and living. They write about topics concerning design, living and home improvements and we've picked up some really useful tips and ideas. All words in this post are my own. </span>Older Single Mumhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16752771952921898184noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4611073670539883304.post-52481077775294780772016-01-19T13:14:00.001+00:002016-01-19T14:48:27.824+00:00Time to Think.<table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh7k4gJLlq8qj9ZknZeym2cOQqQJ-0ptn_k0NGsRa0y7gAUI0HLByzkk4lETyq7IbpHD-2lWIPndKfzvV-goJpp4f6c6U6avJvjEPs7COlHq8PdG3dAaBbG6AoMcyztKdEfW74d2QDZ7uY6/s1600/boys+minions+2.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="300" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh7k4gJLlq8qj9ZknZeym2cOQqQJ-0ptn_k0NGsRa0y7gAUI0HLByzkk4lETyq7IbpHD-2lWIPndKfzvV-goJpp4f6c6U6avJvjEPs7COlHq8PdG3dAaBbG6AoMcyztKdEfW74d2QDZ7uY6/s400/boys+minions+2.jpg" width="400" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Normal form.</td></tr>
</tbody></table>
It happened this Sunday morning. A silence had descended at home - and not one of those eerie ones where you wonder what is wrong.<br />
<br />
Nothing was amiss. Both my children were in sight, sat quietly reading.<br />
<br />
It's only taken ten bleedin' years.<br />
<br />
The six year old now loves Secret Seven books and no longer reads aloud, no longer needs me to read aloud to him, no longer wants me to. *Sigh*<br />
<br />
*Seizes a newspaper, puts feet up*<br />
<br />
*Contemplates.*<br />
<br />
Goodness, it's been a long time coming - time such as this, to think. <br />
<br />
It's lovely when they're squishy little babies, all cuddly and gorgeous, but there's a lot of broken sleep - theirs and, consequently, yours - and just as you pass that stage another little one comes along and the whole process starts again.<br />
<br />
A few years on and they're no longer babies but you can't take your eyes off them for a second. You spend your time separating them, getting them out of the house and clearing up after them, as well as hopefully fitting in lots of actual playing with them and hitting the wine bottle before yet another whole process starts again. So there still isn't really time to breathe, let alone think. <br />
<br />
And then, suddenly, out of the blue, even though you know it's coming because you've already reached this grieving point with your eldest and you know your youngest will get there quicker than he or she did because they have them to copy, the hurly burly of two small children turns into something else: Quiet. And you wonder what's wrong. <br />
<br />
Your nerves are still too shattered to be at ease. An inner alarm goes off needlessly. It's habit.<br />
<br />
Pray tell, what is this place called peace?<br />
<br />
It's something a single parent seldom sees!<br />
<br />
No-one move a muscle.<br />
<br />
Ta. <br />
<br />
Anya XXOlder Single Mumhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16752771952921898184noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4611073670539883304.post-16210750981437939592016-01-14T13:06:00.001+00:002016-01-17T23:33:25.802+00:00Being Back at Work.<div>
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<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhEMo_CsgbhVGTehliomOYTZF687xEzdIrmilgYGwkX3BesMtDMYYvB7K4UHJCRTwYcncYdVbutV-YhsGqnxDeAx1BkNh9u_4_N1khg69i_4yZr0jOTrRuUfopx8OWBdIQeyHFZhPUFk0c0/s1600/telegraph+anya.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><img border="0" height="248" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhEMo_CsgbhVGTehliomOYTZF687xEzdIrmilgYGwkX3BesMtDMYYvB7K4UHJCRTwYcncYdVbutV-YhsGqnxDeAx1BkNh9u_4_N1khg69i_4yZr0jOTrRuUfopx8OWBdIQeyHFZhPUFk0c0/s400/telegraph+anya.jpg" width="400" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Enjoying getting a bit dressed up for work but bugger the high heels.<br />
Photo by Christopher Pledger for The Telegraph.</td></tr>
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<span style="font-family: Times, Times New Roman, serif;">A friend of mine recently described going back to work as exhilarating.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Times, Times New Roman, serif;">Wow, I thought. What a good word. I<span style="font-family: 'Helvetica Neue Light', HelveticaNeue-Light, helvetica, arial, sans-serif;">t got me wondering how I feel about it.</span></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Times, Times New Roman, serif;"><br />Relief was the first thing that sprang to mind. It has been really quite liberating to be able to nip to the loo without anyone breaking into a fight the other side of the door, or someone wanting my attention the moment I pick up the telephone.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Times, Times New Roman, serif;">I've loved it. </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Times, Times New Roman, serif;"><span style="font-family: 'Helvetica Neue Light', HelveticaNeue-Light, helvetica, arial, sans-serif;">No-one argues, switches radio stations or moans about what is for lunch and it's </span>the first time I have had proper, adult company for some years - sustained conversations without interruptions and no requests to wipe a bottom.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Times, Times New Roman, serif;"><span style="font-family: 'Helvetica Neue Light', HelveticaNeue-Light, helvetica, arial, sans-serif;">People who speak English fluently is also a bonus after having tried too many a talk with our Foreign Language Students who go home as soon as they can understand the language enough to chat. We keep having to start all over again and it's </span><span style="font-family: 'Helvetica Neue Light', HelveticaNeue-Light, helvetica, arial, sans-serif;">e</span><span style="font-family: 'Helvetica Neue Light', HelveticaNeue-Light, helvetica, arial, sans-serif;">xhausting!</span></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: 'Helvetica Neue Light', HelveticaNeue-Light, helvetica, arial, sans-serif;">Nowadays I get to sit down for a solid 5-6 hours straight and use my brain. </span></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: 'Helvetica Neue Light', HelveticaNeue-Light, helvetica, arial, sans-serif;">Not that it's not intellectually challenging being at home with two young children. By far the most stretched I've ever been in my life is thinking of ways to get my two boys to want to do what I want them to do, in an effort to keep friction at a minimum. </span></span><br />
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But it's been worth it. Now they can get themselves ready, fetch their own food and drinks and are increasingly independent generally (*sob*), we're all in a position to move on. It's time. </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Times, 'Times New Roman', serif;">You might like to know that your NHS seems to be in safe hands. </span><span style="font-family: Times, 'Times New Roman', serif;">My background is in finance, so it has made sense to return to it and that's where you'll find me now - in one of their departments. I have found the people - so far - clever, kind and competent. T</span><span style="font-family: Times, 'Times New Roman', serif;">hey care very much about how public money is spent and </span><span style="font-family: Times, 'Times New Roman', serif;">patients aren't just numbers. Although I still don't see why the man who sits next to me insists on emailing me relatively unimportant info rather than just telling me it, but that's the younger generation for you. </span><br />
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Frankly, I'm glad most of them are around my age and I have felt quite at home getting dressed up a bit and popping on more make up. </span><br />
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Bugger the high heels though. T<span style="font-family: 'Helvetica Neue Light', HelveticaNeue-Light, helvetica, arial, sans-serif;">hose days are gone.</span></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Times, 'Times New Roman', serif;">How do you feel about going back to work?</span></div>
Older Single Mumhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16752771952921898184noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4611073670539883304.post-46161403558873233222016-01-12T12:50:00.000+00:002016-01-12T14:26:39.962+00:00Our House Guest.<table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjwdsJSfXrI-9hnG7uitVtLHoGiei4lBzgKGE71Qj5yWs4aaSvWyYqlGX-U37j_AhShTpe4JzF4S_hLzP4iMkpVzkQ8OAVspSaAcv7GrHNdT58KXVnJyYvQOGhYadpNTJXygJZe_A8mCHet/s1600/buddy+1.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="298" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjwdsJSfXrI-9hnG7uitVtLHoGiei4lBzgKGE71Qj5yWs4aaSvWyYqlGX-U37j_AhShTpe4JzF4S_hLzP4iMkpVzkQ8OAVspSaAcv7GrHNdT58KXVnJyYvQOGhYadpNTJXygJZe_A8mCHet/s400/buddy+1.jpg" width="400" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Buddy and the boys.</td></tr>
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Every now and then we look after a beautiful dog called Buddy. His lovely owner lives at <a href="http://muminthesouth.co.uk/" target="_blank">Mum in the South</a> and she lets him take us all out for a walk and come for a little holiday.<br />
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As much as the boys and I would all love one of our own, it would really prohibit the number of Foreign Language Students who'd still wish to come and stay and seeing as they're a decent source of income and part of our lives for now, it's something we have to accept.<br />
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In this particular instance, one of them had been stealing from me and was shortly to be leaving us, so I didn't give a stuff about whether or not he likes pets. In fact, I really hoped he didn't, but this wasn't the point.<br />
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We love Buddy, Buddy loves us and we were all very excited he was coming for five nights.<br />
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Generally speaking he's a very well behaved dog, but he refuses to 'sit' for me. He'll do it for my eldest, but then he's the one with the biscuits, whereas I'm the one with the poo bags.<br />
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It makes people stare disapprovingly in the street, while I bark instructions he completely ignores, but that's nothing new. My kids do the same.<br />
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And at night, he can't decide which of us he wants to sleep with, so he likes to share himself around and drive me mad. We're like a proper family.<br />
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The first time he ever stayed over, he was locked in the kitchen and made his upset known, so ended up with me after less than half an hour - which was fine until he started farting. After that, I stuck him on the landing between us all, but he was a bit too big for his basket and after checking up on us countless times, he finally took himself down to the sofa, arguably the most comfortable spot in the house, but where he wouldn't normally be allowed.<br />
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On this occasion, I put a blanket on there for him. He'd stay with the kids while they went to sleep, then come and keep me company downstairs, which was wonderful. Although he didn't like it once when I closed my bedroom door to lessen doggy disturbance, so learned to plonk himself down on the floor in there before bedtime. He knew I wouldn't have the heart to kick him out.<br />
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He had his very own Christmas dinner and helped himself to the turkey accidentally left on the side to cool, despite it being covered with heavy bowls. This meant the ham that was supposed to join it in a pie was served with something else, but we didn't mind. He lived like a lord. <br />
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What he gave us back was better. If he hadn't taken us for a walk every day, for example, we might have missed some spectacular sights.<br />
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We hope it's not too long before he comes for another little holiday!Older Single Mumhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16752771952921898184noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4611073670539883304.post-17926610576758427442016-01-04T10:00:00.000+00:002016-01-04T10:00:01.150+00:00Welcoming 'Divorce Day' with Mortgages for Divorcees!<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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Who knew?! </div>
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Such is the surge of separating spouses to solicitors offices on the first working Monday of the new year, it's now been nicknamed 'Divorce Day!'</div>
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And although it makes me laugh nowadays, the truth is that the Christmas holidays can be a painful time for many people. Simmering tensions and enforced togetherness can bring things to a head that might have ticked along for years and, finally, one partner or another will decide to break free. </div>
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The trouble is that, sometimes, this is only partly possible. </div>
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I split from my ex-husband seven years ago now. We'd been separated for some time before he joined my family for a few days one Christmas and it was so awful (for me) I was among many in the queue that first week of January to file for divorce. That was that and I've never looked back in that particular regard. </div>
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However, we've never been able to break free from each other financially, despite the fact he didn't support us at all for quite a long period.</div>
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Even though I invested quite a large sum into our house, it was purchased in joint names for the mortgage we needed - to cover the extra and, in time, to do the work required. He has never contributed to it and never will, never pays for any repairs or insurances and won't be footing any of the bill for the balance when it matures. He agrees that it's all down to me.</div>
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But if I die, he inherits everything. All my hard work in the city, all my years of paying and doing everything to keep a roof over the childrens' and my head since he was asked to leave, the lot. This worries me. And it's wrong. </div>
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I want to protect my childrens' interests and leave them (or my immediate family should anything happen to all three of us) their rightful legacy, but, until now, lenders have been loathe to consider divorcees to stand on their own as viable mortgagees.</div>
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I say 'until now,' because it seems the<span style="font-family: Times, Times New Roman, serif;"> <span style="line-height: 17.664px; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"> </span><a href="http://t.sidekickopen35.com/e1t/c/5/f18dQhb0S7lC8dDMPbW2n0x6l2B9nMJW7t5XYg4WzM5sVf6M1W3MPftxW4WYnDM56dKykf26F-_Y02?t=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.ibs.co.uk%2Fdivorce&si=6187805766320128&pi=c0acf49a-275c-4b37-ab78-733ced105310" style="background-color: white; color: #1155cc; line-height: 17.664px; text-decoration: none;" target="_blank"><span style="background-color: transparent; color: blue; text-decoration: underline; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"><span class="il">Ipswich</span> <span class="il">Building</span> Society</span></a><span style="line-height: 17.664px; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"> </span></span> have come through, in a new move to help us and although I find their term 'mortgage misfits' a little offensive, the idea behind it is so exciting that it was featured in <a href="http://www.telegraph.co.uk/finance/personalfinance/borrowing/mortgages/12062547/Divorce-mortgages-cash-in-on-Christmas-bust-ups.html" target="_blank">the Telegraph on line </a>last week-end and I was delighted to be a case study for them.</div>
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They are naturally focussing on the finances but the emotional ramifications are massive because they will be helping people finally sever connections that are no longer appropriate or they no longer desire. </div>
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The main premise seems to be that they will now include maintenance payments as income - something more or less irrelevant in my case, but where larger amounts of money change hands monthly, this could have a positive impact for both sides. . </div>
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Also, where they say they are using real people (rather than a computer) to take the decisions has definitely inspired me to apply on merit. </div>
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I asked the Ipswich Building Society to explain:</div>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiqnOheG_yBDWY12g8QLr-WFIP-ZE_861RbZpZCDUCZWs1TPIdPMFviNv2f1IRcgjkZhbLN5-mY3ShcOyK6b43bEiDDvJBHFhEV7zKtdADx1cy0N0gH6gn__dMXOkSX92p2coMCqSbV3R3z/s1600/Getting+a+mortgage+after+divorce+-+infographic+%2528F%2529.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="640" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiqnOheG_yBDWY12g8QLr-WFIP-ZE_861RbZpZCDUCZWs1TPIdPMFviNv2f1IRcgjkZhbLN5-mY3ShcOyK6b43bEiDDvJBHFhEV7zKtdADx1cy0N0gH6gn__dMXOkSX92p2coMCqSbV3R3z/s640/Getting+a+mortgage+after+divorce+-+infographic+%2528F%2529.jpg" width="452" /></a></div>
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<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-weight: 700; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"><span style="font-family: arial, helvetica, sans-serif;">Life after divorce: You and your mortgage.</span></span><br />
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<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-weight: 700; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"><span style="background-color: transparent; font-family: arial, helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 12.8px; font-weight: normal; line-height: 17.664px; vertical-align: baseline;">With </span><a href="http://t.sidekickopen35.com/e1t/c/5/f18dQhb0S7lC8dDMPbW2n0x6l2B9nMJW7t5XYg4WzM5sVf6M1W3MPftxW4WYnDM56dKykf26F-_Y02?t=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.relate.org.uk%2Ffiles%2Frelate%2Fseparation-divorce-factsheet-jan2014.pdf&si=6187805766320128&pi=1fcd0ce9-36d2-461a-f537-8e4763975458" style="color: #1155cc; font-family: arial, helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 12.8px; font-weight: normal; line-height: 17.664px; text-decoration: none; white-space: normal;" target="_blank"><span style="background-color: transparent; color: blue; text-decoration: underline; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">42% of all marriages ending in divorce</span></a><span style="background-color: transparent; font-family: arial, helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 12.8px; font-weight: normal; line-height: 17.664px; vertical-align: baseline;"> it would seem that the season of goodwill is not all it is cracked up to be for many. In fact, typically the first working Monday in January (this year January 4th) has been deemed ‘Divorce Day’, being the day when legal firms see a surge in divorce related enquiries. </span></span></div>
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<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: arial, helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 12.8px; line-height: 1.38; white-space: pre-wrap;">During a divorce, untangling possessions and finances can be stressful, so when all is done it would be easy to presume things going forward will be plain sailing. However, this isn’t always the case. When it comes to a jointly owned home, there are implications regarding the mortgage for both parties both during and after a divorce, and it can often be difficult to get a new mortgage in the future. So, thinking about the practicalities, what does this mean when it comes to getting a mortgage after you and your spouse have separated?</span></div>
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<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-weight: 700; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"><span style="font-family: arial, helvetica, sans-serif;">Why might some divorcees find it hard to get a mortgage?</span></span></div>
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<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"><span style="font-family: arial, helvetica, sans-serif;">In 2014, the Mortgage Market Review shook up the way that we apply for mortgages, imposing stricter affordability criteria and meaning lenders calculate the incomes and outgoings of applicants and judge if they can afford mortgage repayments not just now, but also in the event of any future interest rate rises.</span></span></div>
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<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"><span style="font-family: arial, helvetica, sans-serif;">This means that in the last couple of years divorcees have found themselves in the ‘mortgage misfits’ category – a term used to describe those who have found it harder to obtain a mortgage after the regulation.</span></span></div>
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<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-weight: 700; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"><span style="font-family: arial, helvetica, sans-serif;">What does this mean for divorcees?</span></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: arial, helvetica, sans-serif;"><span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">In many cases a divorce typically results in a reduced household income. Unsurprisingly, the impact of this is felt most in households where one parent takes on child care responsibilities after the divorce. With </span><a href="http://t.sidekickopen35.com/e1t/c/5/f18dQhb0S7lC8dDMPbW2n0x6l2B9nMJW7t5XYg4WzM5sVf6M1W3MPftxW4WYnDM56dKykf26F-_Y02?t=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.ons.gov.uk%2Fons%2Frel%2Ffamily-demography%2Ffamilies-and-households%2F2015%2Fstb-families-and-households.html%23tab-Household-type&si=6187805766320128&pi=1fcd0ce9-36d2-461a-f537-8e4763975458" style="color: #1155cc; text-decoration: none;" target="_blank"><span style="background-color: transparent; color: blue; text-decoration: underline; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">2.8 million UK households consist of lone parents</span></a><span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"> and </span><a href="http://t.sidekickopen35.com/e1t/c/5/f18dQhb0S7lC8dDMPbW2n0x6l2B9nMJW7t5XYg4WzM5sVf6M1W3MPftxW4WYnDM56dKykf26F-_Y02?t=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.ons.gov.uk%2Fons%2Frel%2Fvsob1%2Fdivorces-in-england-and-wales%2F2012%2Fsty-13-facts.html&si=6187805766320128&pi=328c9931-b5a3-41c9-e5b3-ce379441a9d8" style="color: #1155cc; text-decoration: none;" target="_blank"><span style="background-color: transparent; color: blue; text-decoration: underline; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">48% of divorcing couples had at least one child aged under 16 living with the family</span></a><span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"> it really is startling then to learn that only a handful of mortgage lenders will accept child maintenance payments - a crucial source of income for many after a divorce - when making affordability calculations.</span></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: arial, helvetica, sans-serif;"><span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">Luckily, we are one of the lenders who do include child maintenance in our affordability assessment for a mortgage and we are</span><span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"> campaigning for ‘mortgage misfits’ to have fairer access to the mortgage market. As such, we accept 100% of child maintenance for mortgage applicants throughout England and Wales, where supported by a CSA or Court Order with 5 years left to run. </span></span></div>
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<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"><span style="font-family: arial, helvetica, sans-serif;">Another option is to try to find mortgage lenders which use real people to do their underwriting, as they consider applications based on merit rather than a computer based approach. Often these manual processes are used by smaller lenders, such as regional building societies and some specialist banks.</span></span></div>
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<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-weight: 700; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"><span style="font-family: arial, helvetica, sans-serif;">Three top tips if you’re divorcing and have a joint mortgage:</span></span></div>
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<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-weight: 700; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"></span></div>
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<span style="background-color: transparent; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"><span style="font-family: arial, helvetica, sans-serif;">Check your mortgage agreement, or speak to your lender if you are unsure of the conditions for both parties. A mortgage is a big commitment and has a continual obligation for all named holders, regardless of any relationship breakdown.</span></span></div>
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<span style="background-color: transparent; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"><span style="font-family: arial, helvetica, sans-serif;">A separation is a massive upheaval and you may face financial difficulties. Remember if you happen to miss a payment, or go into arrears even just for a short while it can affect your credit and your ability to get a mortgage in the future.</span></span></div>
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<span style="background-color: transparent; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"><span style="font-family: arial, helvetica, sans-serif;">Long term you need to consider the options. It may be that one party can take on the mortgage by themselves, and buy the other out of their share of the property. When going through the courts the priority will be to ensure any children have a secure home. Some typical orders the courts may make, include:</span></span></div>
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<span style="background-color: transparent; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"><span style="font-family: arial, helvetica, sans-serif;">transfer of ownership, with lesser share of possessions;</span></span></div>
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<span style="background-color: transparent; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"><span style="font-family: arial, helvetica, sans-serif;">retaining joint ownership but giving one party the right to stay;</span></span></div>
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<span style="background-color: transparent; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"><span style="font-family: arial, helvetica, sans-serif;">transferring the home to one party but with a charge secured on the property (ensuring the other party receives a set percentage when the home is sold), or</span></span></div>
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<span style="background-color: transparent; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"><span style="font-family: arial, helvetica, sans-serif;">selling the home and splitting the proceeds between both parties in whatever proportions are deemed fair.</span></span></div>
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<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: arial, helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 12.8px; line-height: 1.38; white-space: pre-wrap;">Remember, many of these require a change in mortgage contract so make sure you speak with your mortgage lender as soon as possible. In addition, as every situation is different, it is best to seek legal advice and speak to a professional in the first instance about your options if you and your spouse decide to divorce.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: arial, helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 12.8px; line-height: 1.2; white-space: pre-wrap;">YOUR HOME MAY BE REPOSSESSED IF YOU DO NOT KEEP UP REPAYMENTS ON YOUR MORTGAGE</span></div>
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<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"><span style="font-family: arial, helvetica, sans-serif;">This is a collaborative post that has made me jump up and down with joy!</span></span></div>
Older Single Mumhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16752771952921898184noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4611073670539883304.post-58161186679807657602015-12-31T23:10:00.001+00:002016-01-02T23:26:14.607+00:00To Single Parents Everywhere. For some of you, this will have been your first festivities as a lone parent and it's undoubtedly tough.<br />
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I want you to know that, no matter what, things will be different this time next year. You'll never, ever have to go through the first time again, your children will be older and a lot of water will have passed under many a bridge by the time another New Year's Eve comes around.<br />
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You will be braver, stronger and more at peace than you can ever imagine, even though things might not be perfect. No-one's got it perfect, even if they look like they have and it's important to remember that.<br />
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No matter which way your life goes - and it may not stray too far from where you're presently at - if your kids are happy and healthy then you're doing a great job and have much to be proud of.<br />
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This time will go quickly and it will be special, just you and them. Your friends might be out partying while you're stuck at home 'baby'sitting, but you get used to it and, frankly, you need all the rest you can get, so it's not necessarily a bad thing.<br />
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<table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgufT2FZD8cP83wGnhxy3i9GLFz78wcZgIj4i6hzfCK0p4daPqxyKMGR5k1vdJbyrxsOkzykkoj2_TVyDjPlSbusZIZrAAbZO5ThqhqP7DNhb22FIEzh2atVPCmSe7EYxdWLtlEytbogw2o/s1600/boys+xmas+2015.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="640" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgufT2FZD8cP83wGnhxy3i9GLFz78wcZgIj4i6hzfCK0p4daPqxyKMGR5k1vdJbyrxsOkzykkoj2_TVyDjPlSbusZIZrAAbZO5ThqhqP7DNhb22FIEzh2atVPCmSe7EYxdWLtlEytbogw2o/s640/boys+xmas+2015.jpg" width="478" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">My boys, now 10 1/2 and 6 1/2.</td></tr>
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These two munchkins came back from a short stay at their father's yesterday. Gosh, it was a wrench to let them go, but it was awfully nice not to have to get up early for just a couple of mornings too. I stayed up late watching The Holiday, The Shawshank Redemption (remember its message about always gotta have hope?) and even Erin Brockovich. Now there's a feisty and inspiring single mother if ever there were one.<br />
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And here's another little message some of us more seasoned ones received kind of from arguably the most famously successful single parent ever -<br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj9NbPtf6AlDmopYQE-P8IdtufzKrPDVtRcZygRxHIvug8A7LARqLW8oQezQo6HJZ-2ydv9jDx6pApfR-VxXPQbbm2NPZfs0GjSVqMiLh5v4gb4yZJSJJiWgAVCo2J_PaKiQmaIbX9NTn5c/s1600/jk+rowling+xmas+card.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="640" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj9NbPtf6AlDmopYQE-P8IdtufzKrPDVtRcZygRxHIvug8A7LARqLW8oQezQo6HJZ-2ydv9jDx6pApfR-VxXPQbbm2NPZfs0GjSVqMiLh5v4gb4yZJSJJiWgAVCo2J_PaKiQmaIbX9NTn5c/s640/jk+rowling+xmas+card.jpg" width="640" /></a></div>
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I don't want to stay a single parent for ever and I'm sure you don't, but it's necessary to have breathing space before moving on. Kid yourself not that the fall-out from your ex-relationship won't affect a new one. It needs to be well dead in the water before you can begin again.<br />
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And I don't mean any offence to those who have lost partners. That's a whole other grieving process for which you have my sincere condolences and hearfelt hope for healing.<br />
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Lots of lone parents don't want to move on and meet anyone else, even if only for a while. That's mostly women. We pick up the pieces of so many emotions for so many people you wouldn't believe it unless you'd experienced it first hand.<br />
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Friends and family are affected by any split or divorce and the changes that can occur there can be just as painful as those between partners and the effects on the children.<br />
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So cut yourselves some slack. Enjoy yourselves as far as possible and please stay postive as you see in 2016. <br />
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Happy New Year to my single parent friends, new and old and to you, my lovely, mainly happily married readers. Thank you for your company these last few years. I hope we can spend many more together and I really look forward to seeing how far we've all come when we're toasting 2017!<br />
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Chin Chin and Lots of Love,<br />
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Anya XXOlder Single Mumhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16752771952921898184noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4611073670539883304.post-13659144234990406922015-12-10T18:22:00.002+00:002015-12-12T18:07:32.164+00:00Hotter Comes to Brighton and I challenge their 100% Happy Guarantee.When I first wandered into a Hotter shoes store a while ago, it left me a bit nonplussed. <br />
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Bloggers seemed to be banging on about them, but they really didn't appeal to me. My feeling was that they were frumpy.<br />
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Fast forward perhaps a couple of years and I found myself invited to one of their events ahead of the <a href="http://www.blogonconference.com/" target="_blank">Blog On </a>conference in Winchester. It was very tempting not to go, but it seemed rude not to try to see what all the fuss was about.<br />
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I turned up with my kids in tow, accidentally very late because of severe traffic congestion on the trip down and missed most of the presentation about the brand, but was met the moment we walked in the door by some surprisingly serious colour and style stuff like this. <br />
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<table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjCTK343jlZrVF7QM_3vaC7Q0ESBC8GS3TUTPa_p0VrRDk5j9i84wqhQkwxpoqTbF5JEZppijQ8BIFCE6vBNxCOh6vHgyBqbCERNB9C9EGYJ-OisWj_7V0weh8pMtDZ5FeVIN2T_ho5uDbm/s1600/PicMonkey+Collage.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img alt="hotter shoes, winchester, brighton, " border="0" height="617" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjCTK343jlZrVF7QM_3vaC7Q0ESBC8GS3TUTPa_p0VrRDk5j9i84wqhQkwxpoqTbF5JEZppijQ8BIFCE6vBNxCOh6vHgyBqbCERNB9C9EGYJ-OisWj_7V0weh8pMtDZ5FeVIN2T_ho5uDbm/s640/PicMonkey+Collage.jpg" title="hotter shoes, winchester, brighton, " width="640" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Hotter customers want comfort and colour. </td></tr>
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Hmmm. Not so frumpy after all then. <br />
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And all the talk was about having a 'Hotter Moment,' something you get when you try on a pair. <br />
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Still sceptical and trying to catch up on what I'd missed, whilst trying to keep my two children who'd been restrained for three hours in the car under control, didn't make for a very relaxing start, but the staff are incredible and as soon as I slipped on some lovely looking loafers, my 'Hotter Moment' came. They were breath-takingly comfortable. <br />
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Their 'Comfort Concept' passion is about making shoes as comfortable as slippers - with soft leathers, supportive styles, all sat on millons of air bubbles. They worked immediately for me and I ended up ordering some to be able to write about them properly.<br />
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However, despite it normally suiting me to wear a wider shoe - their fittings are generally wider than most other shops, they gaped a bit at the sides when I walked and this put me off wearing them, which was disappointing, having just started my new job and thinking they'd be perfect for it. <br />
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I, therefore, had to return them and was gutted to do so when I'd acquired the art of walking on air!<br />
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Yet Hotter are very proud of their 100% Happy Guarantee and insisted I was receiving no special treatment when an exchange was offered. If I'd been a paying customer, a refund would always also be applicable if necessary.<br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi-Yg8AilUhDyRzBOMFQFCKnC_7stN_zAQIGDt_Ml50DuTlpnLkdnWqRUCytY0hTWPsPzaiUcM8oZN0t6TCGqvguQsikx0F4_Y91zmO7Hy2O2JJ8RAEiKv_F_O_PboYdNyZchJRwMUju6kQ/s1600/100-Happy-Guaranteex2.gif" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img alt="hotter shoes guarantee, " border="0" height="201" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi-Yg8AilUhDyRzBOMFQFCKnC_7stN_zAQIGDt_Ml50DuTlpnLkdnWqRUCytY0hTWPsPzaiUcM8oZN0t6TCGqvguQsikx0F4_Y91zmO7Hy2O2JJ8RAEiKv_F_O_PboYdNyZchJRwMUju6kQ/s640/100-Happy-Guaranteex2.gif" title="hotter shoes guarantee, " width="640" /></a></div>
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<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiAiIltDjbzCf3EG6lx73oBIvPj8-kbBiasd6cqHhFiU-V92OSb2YWzZsTbH33Jr3j7xfvnQSpw2pEC-Lj6XvFUzLYPUtxwjv4IPdPzBddKrv4-1DznFxAb1hv5Oyb2t4v3WbOWCeNZ022D/s1600/PicMonkey+Collage.jpg+boots.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img alt=" hotter shoes, belle boot, ivy boot, shipley loafers, " border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiAiIltDjbzCf3EG6lx73oBIvPj8-kbBiasd6cqHhFiU-V92OSb2YWzZsTbH33Jr3j7xfvnQSpw2pEC-Lj6XvFUzLYPUtxwjv4IPdPzBddKrv4-1DznFxAb1hv5Oyb2t4v3WbOWCeNZ022D/s320/PicMonkey+Collage.jpg+boots.jpg" title="hotter shoes, belle boot, ivy boot, shipley loafers, " width="320" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">I had to give my loafers the boot and loved both of these - the Belle (note the adjustable calf fit) and the Ivy (only tan left in stock or they would have been my choice).</td></tr>
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How many Hotter Moments can a woman have I wondered, plus how much luckier even that they've just opened locally in Brighton - to great fanfare?!<br />
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<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgsVl3MbElH3mxkBo4dfpQZzC_bXHR0EN4SRF4ZRi_yIraR6A8KPMh_cwXyYoUue97KvbUobRHiA6P_MWsqglokoQNF5EbBQEpDol1BlyPuWl3jEk-29e6E_wvrQSfyH60uRvbTST_C5fWN/s1600/hotter.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img alt="hotter shoes brighton, " border="0" height="480" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgsVl3MbElH3mxkBo4dfpQZzC_bXHR0EN4SRF4ZRi_yIraR6A8KPMh_cwXyYoUue97KvbUobRHiA6P_MWsqglokoQNF5EbBQEpDol1BlyPuWl3jEk-29e6E_wvrQSfyH60uRvbTST_C5fWN/s640/hotter.jpg" title="hotter shoes brighton, " width="640" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Hotter opening in Brighton last week.</td></tr>
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And could they be more British? We were treated to a Town Crier and a choir, Bucks Fizz and M & S nibbles! <br />
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Hotter make more shoes in the UK than anyone else, won the Queen's Award for Enterprise and UK Manufacturer of the year 2015. They advised that the Shipley loafers might not have been right for me, because they design different shaped shoes for different shaped feet. <br />
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I'd have loved those black Ivy boots above, but, alas, only tan is now available and they're not my colour. It was the Belle boots that came home with me instead and, as it happens, I'm really pleased with them. They are just dandy - really light and somewhat springy underfoot, plus the adjustable calf fitting means they can be worn over skinnys or more snuggly done up with a skirt. <br />
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Styles sell out quickly as everything is unique to them. Their technology is world leading and, apparently, Hotter are led by their customers who want comfort and colour and up to date designs, so it's no wonder they now have a million - including internationally - seeing as they patently (pun intended!) listen to them. Plus, there are always <a href="http://www.hotter.com/gb/en" target="_blank">plenty of decent discount codes on the go.</a><br />
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Sometimes, it's not a bad thing when bloggers are banging on about a brand. I'm off to check out their matching handbags ...!<br />
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<span style="background-color: white; font-family: "times" , "times new roman" , serif; line-height: 16px; text-align: center;"><b>Disclosure</b> - Hotter gave me a pair of Belle boots for the purpose of this article but all words are honest and my own obvs. </span><span style="background-color: white; color: white; font-family: "times" , "times new roman" , serif; line-height: 18px; text-align: center;">oulgrave and Melanie Killilea visit Buckingham Palace.</span>Older Single Mumhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16752771952921898184noreply@blogger.com