13 March 2013

Five Favourite Miffs.

We all have our miffs, don't we?  The things that really naff us off - not rage-inducing stuff, just a bit narky.  Well I'm going to  let you into a little secret - I've re-named them.

You know when you're generally just thinking to yourself  'FFS,' like you do, which, if you use text speak, you'll know exactly what it means, but, if not it shouldn't take you very long to work out?  Well miffs have been re-christened 'My FFS!'

Here are my five favourites presently:

Feeling miffed starts pretty early in the day. We'll by-pass the whole sleep (or lack of) palaver and go straight to getting the Nutella out of the cupboard for the kids' morning porridge.  You can guarantee the jar will be found empty, as will be the peanut butter / marmalade / jam ones in the fridge, also, when we decide on toast instead then.  This will be kind courtesy of our foreign language students.

Why not leave the plundered containers out on the side so some more gets bought?  Why put them back, thereby lulling us all into a false sense of security? And, honestly, do they really have to leave their late night feast entrails all over the kitchen worktop FFS for Heavens' sake?

On the whole, however, they're great guys!

The second miff - we move on to the school run - a journey that takes seven minutes in the car, apart from when we're on the school run when it takes forty.  Despite the fact we use this time constructively for the eldest to learn his times' tables (and it looks like an opportunity to learn five languages in the years to come), it's still annoying that there's a mad dash around at home, with lots of shouting plenty of good hearted cajoling and coaxing, grabbing coats and book bags and lunchboxes in order to get out of the house on time, just to come to a sudden sit still in the car, for an age, and for which I'd really rather be briefly relaxing and listening to Radio 2 than doing sums.

Mind you, the majority of it this is along the coast road with splendid views out to sea, so should I be feeling so frustrated at all?

Morning coffee with friends makes number three.  £2.30 per cup, per day?  Whose planet did that get decided on?  And what's all the fuss about cake all the time?  It's vastly overrated, not to mention also overpriced.  I find the nation's need to obsess about it increasingly flummoxing.

Yet, here we are with three lovely big Birthday cakes at home - one we made ourselves (a first), another so very kindly brought by a friend who is a chef and the last bought by said students!

Something that doesn't happen daily, but mightily miffs me though is number four and it is much more common than is bearable:  Hearing anyone, anywhere, anytime bleating about 'Could of / would of / should of.'  Aaargh!  It's 'coudda woudda shoudda' because it's 'Could HAVE / would HAVE / should HAVE,' FFS for goodness' sake.

Perhaps we should check on the ex-husbands'?!

And the most massive miff of all, number five, would be my ex-husband presently paying only £7.00 per week maintenance, off arrears of many hundreds of pounds, or nothing at all, thus forcing them to continually accrue and compelling me to take in yet another foreign language student, which is only going to exacerbate my FFS matters, but there's no way I would want to give him that satisfaction so we won't go there.

Instead, him not giving me money due is one thing - I'm used to being exploited by him - but parking meters?   If they can get a man on the moon soft drinks machines can give change, why can't they?  It's irritating enough having to pay for parking constantly anyway, but needing the correct coins - and naturally never being organized enough to always have them on one's person can rather give rise to feeling ripped off regularly when they don't cough up the balance owed either.

But I suppose that I should appreciate the fact I own a car, that I run it and that I'm not catching the bus everywhere with two children in tow?

So these are my little miffs, my FFS - nothing earth shattering, just little tolerations that we all have to endure.  What are yours?  I'd really love to know!