20 May 2013

The Morning Shower.

The fearsome four year old is outside the bathroom door:  'Mummy! Mummy! Mummy!'

Me:  'Darling,  I'm in the shower.'

Him:  'Mummy! Mummy!'

Me:  'It'll have to wait sweetheart. I'm washing my hair.'

Him:  'Mummy!'

Me:  'Don't come in.  The students are around. I don't want them to see me.'

Pause.

Scarily long silence.

There's no crying coming from either of them.

Me:  'Is your brother all right?  Are you all right?'

Unison: 'Yes Mummy!'

I've made sure the windows are closed before even contemplating getting in and that there's nothing dangerous lying around, given them the 'nice boys with no fighting get nice scooter rides to school' lecture.  They're both clearly still alive.  The eldest will be reading, the youngest is still waiting patiently.

Him:  'Mummy!'

Me: *exasperated voice* 'Honestly darling, I'm just taking my morning shower. Everything is fine.  I'll be out in a few minutes.'

Him:  'But, Mummy...'

Resignedly, the water is switched off rather earlier than anticipated, but I am clean.  It has been a short lived, perfunctory pleasure.  The warm towel is wrapped right around my shoulders and, bracing myself for whatever chaos may await me today, mumbling about how there is honestly never any peace, I open the door to him.

'Mummy! What comes after 109?'

#badmother


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29 comments:

  1. My little boy lets himself into the bathroom when I'm in the bath as he's sussed how to work the lock from the outside! Within seconds, he throws his all his letters, ducks and boats into my bath water and my peace is shattered. I get out when he tries to wash my hair! Nice post. Enjoyed it!

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    1. Glad you enjoyed it - I empathise with you :)

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  2. LOL!!! Definitely one of those moments!!x

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  3. love it! I get the Mummy, Mummy, Mummy calls and hear the footsteps up the stairs and the door opens and the arrival occurs. Often. I havent been asked what comes after 109 yet though! classic xx

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    1. I'm sure your little one with give you plenty yet - no peace! :)

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  4. Children and their burning questions!

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  5. Never mind. You weren't to know. Anyway you did the right thing - can't have those students seeing you in your birthday suit. Little A won't let me do a poo in peace - is quite happy to stand there and watch - but when the tables are turned and she's on the bog - oh, no, no, no - she won't have have me coming in, I am barred from entering! X.

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    1. That's really funny! So typical. Only another several years before you get to do one in peace!

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  6. I'm allowed to shower but the moment i get on the phone I am needed to answer a million questions. I have resorted to bribery - if you talk ot me while I'm on the phone there'll be no sweets at all tomorrow. I'm not chatting on the phone you understand - just answering it and making arrangements, usually for DD.

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    1. Aaagh! That's another one. They ignore you all morning, but the moment you pick up the 'phone, they want you and want you and want you! :)

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  7. How patient you are. I've taken to feigning deafness when mine holler for me and I wouldn't interrupt my shower for any crisis.

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    1. That's an encouraging idea, thank you!

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  8. They managed to get to 109?? Crikey, consider yourself lucky! Mine only get as far as 4 before they want me out of the shower ;)

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  9. How sweet. Glad to see you are taking a shower x

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  10. ARGGGGGH! I would be gritting my teeth...! You are a very #patientmother :)

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    1. I don't know any different tbh Michelle! :)

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  11. Kitty showers with me - it's the only way she'll have a shower! But it's very interesting to here a 5 year olds take on my naked body!!!

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    1. That can't be the reason you put yourself through that!

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  12. Bless that little boy! Mummies need shower time in peace though! Loved this x

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    1. He's only just four, so I was actually really proud of him!

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  13. Haha! That takes me back a few years!

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  14. You'd been in there a long time if they got to 109! So funny, and oh so familiar!

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    1. It didn't feel long enough, however long it was and am glad it's not just us! :)

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  15. Brilliant! You couldn't make it up. Bless x

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  16. Ha ha often had similar situations. Bless their cotton socks. xx

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