8 January 2014

50 is the new 30.


I'm going to be 50 this year.  Don't know quite how to say that without it hurting or it making me reel.

The surprise is quite shocking.

Last year, it was ' next year,' the facing of it could be put off a while yet and it's not like I didn't know it was coming, but the truth is, I still feel so crap at everything.  

I didn't expect to be where I am in my life - struggling to make ends meet, stuck on the shelf, permanently exhausted and still shouting at the kids.

I thought it would mean something more sophisticated, that I might have 'made it' by now, got to where I'm going, that kind of thing.
    
Alas, it's nothing of the sort, but perspective comes from remembering those who have been taken away too young and not made it this far at all.  A close friend of mine survived a few days past her fortieth Birthday and another lost her husband when he was 46, so, for this, the fact I'm here, healthy (ish) and happy (ish) should be enough. 

Image- Dr Digi's
In an ideal world grabbing a great hotel deal somewhere wonderful would have been my first choice, just to kick back, relax and enjoy being waited on - because it's the least I would deserve, being so ancient, although anywhere hot would nowadays involve an intense amount of sun tan lotion slathering to prevent those tell tale age spots, tonnes of too much breathing in and awkward, clumsy clambering on and off loungers, seeing as stiffness so swiftly takes hold of stillness. 

Not that it would do to say no to one, obviously.  Nor to one nearer home, even.  However, c'est la vie and, having been spoilt rotten on such special occasions previously, I'm not complaining.  My 18th and 21sts were true and fitting Birthday bashes in Bournemouth and Jersey respectively, my 30th was spent cruising somewhere off Queensland, Australia (although the weather was pants and some were seasick, but not so bad it wasn't possible to sup some serious bubbles) and the morning of my 40th was spent at the Grand Hotel in Brighton with my then future husband before booking our future wedding and even though we all know the way that went, it had been exactly what I wanted to do on the day!  

Perhaps my 50th, therefore, marks the beginning of a new era.  It may be just the start of the second half of my life, which is not as inconceivable as one might imagine when my 97 year old Nan is still in fine form, as it's in the genes, so adventures anew might yet beckon.  She says she feels about 30 inside and with two such young children this might be much more of an appropriate age for me to be when they're the reason my life is organized chaos with less emphasis on the organized than one might expect of someone in my advanced years.  

It, therefore, seems fitting not to quash the common rumour that 50 really is the new 30, but please humour me while I get used to it.

How do you feel about getting older?  




Disclosure: This is a collaborative post, but all words are true and my own, obvs!

91 comments:

  1. My birth certificate tells me I'm 65, the mirror tells me I'm probably over 50, getting out of bed in the mornings makes me feel about 75, but my brain is still that of a thirty-five year-old and I still have plenty of living to do. I aim to make 100 not out, so with lots of exercise, healthy eating, stepping (occasionally) outside of the comfort zone and generally having fun I'm really looking forward to the next 35 years, when I'll pop back and see how you're getting on at 85!
    Joy x x

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    1. What an inspiration you are Joy! I've just had a good look through all three of your blogs. The mirror lies, you know xx

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    2. Haha, my mirror is my friend, but it does need cleaning, as do my glasses! BTW only one of my blogs is current, the other two are now dormant but thanks for looking anyway xx

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    3. I find we look much younger when mirrors and glasses need cleaning. And I saw that two of your blogs were covering the years 2012 /13 but had a good look through anyhow. Will be keeping an eye on your current one now! X

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  2. Yay! 50 is indeed the new 30 and wow to your Nan's age... yes, you still have half your life ahead of you!!!

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    1. Yay! Thank you - and yes, she's fab, so of course I do!

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  3. I find it hard to believe that I'm getting older, I still feel like a teenager inside sometimes and have to remind myself that I have children and a mortgage! I hope that you find something lovely to do to celebrate.

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    1. I know what you mean - glad to know it's not only me taken by surprise! Thank you - I surely will by then :)

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  4. There is no way you are going to be 50. I simply don't believe it!

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    1. It's better than the alternative .... thank you anyway! x

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  5. Wow!! Can't believe you're turning 50. You look younger than me!! I love posts like this. The reflection on fun times, the hopes for the future and the recognition that the train won't stop so we just got to get on with it. Perhaps learning a new skill in your 50's? What do you fancy?

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    1. Thank you but it's not true! Yes, it has been fun and there's no reason to believe it won't continue to be fun just because of age. I think having two young children can be a tie no matter our age, I just don't feel grown up at all yet! A new skill is a nice idea - will give that some thought. Still trying to get to grips with the ambitions for my writing, but will definitely consider it, thank you :)

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  6. I shall be 40 next week and I'm not quite comfortable with it. I'm handling it better than when I was 30 though. Then I stayed in my room all day and sulked for a week. I am sure I am still 24, then I look in the mirror and realise I'm not!

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    1. 40 is a great age - and I loved being 30. Try to make the most of it because before long you'll have caught up with me - it goes faster as you get older! Hope you have a great Birthday!

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  7. Our new girl at work commented that she was going to struggle getting used to being 'grown up' and working. And I looked at myself and thought - "you mean you think I'm grown up"??? I may be pushing 40 but age is just a number, it's what you're doing with yourself that counts xxx

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    1. You're so right - perhaps it's heartening to realise that lots of us never feel grown up at all! xx

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  8. I am quite afraid of growing old! But it is just a number! I should be like you being positive!

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    1. I hadn't thought of it as growing old you cheeky thing! I could block you for that ;) but you have given me some more perspective, thank you, I think!

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  9. well you know how I feel about being grateful for still being here, some don't get a choice and yes, you do look great!! Jersey is a favourite of mine, many happy memories there, being with your boys for your birthday bash will be the best one yet xxx

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    1. Yes, I do and it's a truth I haven't lost sight of. You know how I like to take the mickey out of myself. I lived in Jersey for four years and love it still. I have a feeling you're right about the eventual bash xx

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    2. how lovely & lucky to live in Jersey, Mr S lived in Guernsey, I must take E to both this year x

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  10. I'm sure we can get through this 50 lark together. It's quite a shock to think our forties are nearly over but I'm determined to just see it as a number and carry on regardless.

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    1. Yes, it already feels better having an ally and you're a braver woman than me, but then you're probably far more together than I am! X

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  11. I panic, but then when I arrive and feel no different I just get on with it. I'm beyond caring really other than taking steps to improve my health. Although I'm sure 50 will feel a bit like New Year's Eve - a big deal that has to be done properly, but that will inevitably not be. In any case, you HAVE made it - look at you, you're incredible!

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    1. I can only imagine your party - it will be a bash and a half! X

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  12. I still haven't accepted becoming thirty, instead I am staying 29 forever just like my Nanna. Personally I would make two lists, accomplishments and regrets... I bet you find far more accomplishments in your past than regrets. Plus some of those regrets you can simply work on in your fifties!

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  13. I'm still 27 so still finding it weird to think in a couple of years I will be 30!! But these days I think 50 is not old, happy birthday and hope you have many more great years to come!

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    1. The best is yet to come and thank you :)

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  14. i think from about 25 onwards we are all just the same, age is just a number and all that! sounds like you've got great genes! x

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  15. The teenage boy loves saying I am a half century old, so once I got used to that, it wasn't so bad.

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    1. Thanks for that Catherine #nothelping ! ;)

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  16. I turn 40 this year and still don't know what I want to be when I grew up!

    Having met you, I'd never have had you down as that age if that's any consolation! x

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    1. That's what I'm talking about - and having met you, I'd never have had you down as that age either! xx

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  17. You don't look like you can possibly be fifty this year. Man, I would kill to look as young as you and I am 34! I feel about 70 mot mornings though LOL. I hope you have a truly terrific birthday x

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    1. Thank you - and you are gorgeous and I'm afraid young babies can have that effect - you'll soon bounce back! x

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  18. Weirdly enough I totally panicked over 30, but 40 didn't phase me? Maybe because I refuse to get "old", despite having arthritis!!!!! My husband is 50 this year too - and we become grandparents in Feb too -well, step granny for me and I am trying not to think about it!

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    1. How interesting - and that's a great philosophy to consciously live by. Congratulations on becoming a granny in the future. Can't imagine that one either!

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  19. I'm having the big 3-0 this year and everyone else seems to be way more excited about it than me. Age is just a number, how you feel is what counts x

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    1. It's a lovely age Carolin - and we all say that when we're younger but it seems to be the general consensus!

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  20. Oh gosh I struggle with the age thing, I hate being anything older than 25 although I'm far happier now than I was in my teens. I guess there's no point in worrying over something we are unable to change, and as you say we already know people who haven't made it this far. Embrace the big 5 0 !

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    1. You're right about being happier as we get older - and so, therefore, yes, I will, thank you :)

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  21. I generally try not to think about getting older, it's too scary how fast time passes.

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  22. Since hitting 30 I'm beginning to think that age really is just a number. I know so many people in their 50's and 60's who seem to be going back to their youth and having a whale of a time! Hope you have a great 50th whatever you decide to do!

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    1. Thank you - it's definitely younger than it seems to be when I was young!

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  23. I was forty last January and was really looking forward to it. I love birthdays but big ones are definitely the best! I think age is just a number and I still feel 25 inside, if I was you I would book yourself a spa day and have a pamper! Enjoy it whatever you do :-) x

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    1. You seem 25 on the inside too - and that's a nice idea for after celebrating with the kids!

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  24. I'm heading that way too.... good to know that you're nearly there, and looking amazing!! Time is certainly whizzing by, I still feel as good as I did 25 years ago, so happy to carry on towards 50 please and thank you xx

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    1. Glad to be in good company and so do you, yes it is and am so glad you feel that good. I feel inspired by you so thank you too! xx

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  25. 50? Really? I find it hard to believe! xx

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  26. I hated the thought of turning 50 (18 months ago). it was a hard to get my head around. How had this happened? Where had the time gone? etc... I too have lost a couple of friends in their 40s and had exactly the same thoughts you did. Then the big day came and went and nothing changed. It was just a number after all.

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    1. I remember the build up to yours actually - can't believe it was that long ago - yikes! It still seemed so far off for me then, but now it's more or less here. Onwards and upwards eh? :)

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  27. Isn't life interesting when it takes a different turn than you expected in so many ways? I am only 27, but I had also hoped I would be farther along in life experience by this aage than I am. I'm glad your 18th, 21st, 30th and 40th birthday parties were great. Hopeyour 50th will surprise you and be as good.

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    1. It honestly gets better as you get older and I think it's good to be open and flexible. I'm not one for plans and routines - I like to feel my way. Thank you for your good wishes and it probably will surprise me. Best wishes with all yours to come :)

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  28. I still think i am a teenager half the time! I forget that i am getting older and it catches me out every now and then (as wrinkles are starting to appear!) x

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    1. Yes - it's catching your reflection and not recognising yourself that happens too!

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  29. My Nan is 90 this year and she is still as fierce as she ever was. I catch sight of myself every once in a while and I am surprised that I look the way I do as I have a completely different image in my brain but I think this is just a woman thing, rather than an age one. As for you young lady ..... you are looking FABULOUS xx

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    1. It's lovely to still have our nans. Although mine's mellowing a bit now she's still got a strong mind. You look FABULOUS too and thank you :)

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  30. Well I think you look ruddy marvellous for (nearly) fifty!! And just think, you have nearly fifty whole tears ahead of you, given that much time anything is possible :)

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    1. Thank you and thank you - it will be my mantra!

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  31. I have started making a list to do next year when I turn 40 - The Cochella festival in the States minus the kids, a family motorhome holiday in Canada - well I can dream big !!!!

    PS You don't look a day over 21 :)

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    1. That sounds fantastic - hope it all comes off. There's nothing wrong with big dreams - you deserve it all. Fibber, but thanks! xx

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  32. I'm in total denial about my age now...in fact I might just come up with an age (mid 20s) and stick at that from now on!! :)

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    1. I tried that for a while and then had to shift it to mid 30s and now it's going up again! Good luck with that! ;)

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  33. I turn 40 this year and can't say I am too impressed about it. What makes it worse is that my eldest turns 21.......I still feel 21 (most of the time) - how is it possible I have a 21 year old daughter?

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    1. How is it possible that gorgeous young looking you has a 21 year old daughter indeed? Congratulations :)

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  34. You are a fantastic lady and age doesn't matter that much these days. Being happy - ish and healthy - ish is all we can wish for. Enjoy life and simple things x kisses x

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    1. Thank you and I'm grateful for it all - you're right xxx

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  35. My birth certificate assures me I'm 30. But i feel more like a hagridden 70 year old and probably look it too, if 50 is the new 30 bring it on!

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  36. I don't really care about my age, but I am glad to have got this far and to have the family I've got. I think everyone looks around them from time to time and questions whether they've achieved enough for whatever age they are at the time, but ultimately it's all irrelevant, I think, as long as you're going in the right direction and making the best of the journey :)

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    1. You're right, it's irrelevant and I do feel I'm heading in the right direction and making the best of it, so thank you and feelings of achievement are different for everyone, aren't they? Thank you for commenting :)

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  37. I was VERY upset about turning 40; I can't even imagine turning 50 God forbid. BUT you have a youthful attitude on your side, two boys who keep you young, a graceful attitude, and hey you look FABULOUS! Great post, but trying not to think about 50 yikes!
    Liska xx

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    1. It will be here before you know it and best you get used to the idea - you've the best to come yet, I promise and thank you xx

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  38. Oh I couldn't agree more with rumour. 50 is the new 30! Embrace it, you look fabulous!!

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    1. Good to have you onside. And yes, I feel inclined now. Thank you - as do you :)

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  39. Well you don't look it lovely, not at all, and then there's your bubbly spirit too. It is but a number and you are ageing very, very gracefully, as it should be, a wiser bloom every year. At the moment, I am quite liking ageing, and know I need to keep a check on my health, is why I'm at the yoga again. I am your 80th comment! XXX

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    1. Well that's very kind of you, knowing me up close and personal as you do and I same the same about you. We're like good wines, eh? So glad the yoga is working for you. Must get back to that myself with the stiffness setting in! My posts do not feel complete until you have read and commented! XXX

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  40. Well if it's any consolation, you sure don't look it! xx

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  41. I would also say you do not look 50. I lost a lot of people young so I don't mind getting older at all, in fact I still feel really young (even though my son will be an adult this year!). Enjoy your new era :)

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  42. Thank you Joy - and you do not look your age - or like a mother of four boys either - let alone an adult one! It's a blessing to be older :)

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  43. Like you I have a great view of age, I only just lost my Grandma at nearly 97 who was fit all her life and culturally the Greeks have such great respect for their elders so I have a HUGE appreciation for those older than I and about getting older!

    My gran didn't have a single wrinkle either-all about the genes and of course supporting those-clean, healthy food, not too much direct sun, exercise and LAUGHTER!

    You look wonderful, here's to another 50 years beautiful x

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    1. Can tell you've got excellent genes! Yes, here's to laughter and another 50 years xx

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  44. Do let me know if 50 is the new 30 as I'll be 50 next year. Good Luck. I like to imagine I'll be a wild cougar but I expect I'll be a moth eaten moggy

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    1. Thank you and I shall indeed show you that life indeed goes on and there is nothing to fear! I KNOW you'll be a fine cougar x

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  45. I'm on the edge of 40 and brushing some nagging voices in my head aside. It's so easy to take a big number, 40 or 50, and start evaluating everything. I do think (failing body parts aside) that age is very much a state of mind thing. Positive mental attitude is what keeps us young. And when I read your blog I see that you've got that by the bucket load. Looking forward to raising a glass with you when the big day comes...*puts champagne on ice*

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  46. Thank you, thank you, thank you :) x

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